Love

I am a directioner. A simple normal plain directioner. Or was. I was one of the millions of their fans who lived in a very small city which meant no meeting them for me. Or so I thought. I never expected this. Never. For my dreams to come true. To hurt someone I love while they did. Now I scream when am alone because I don't know what to do. I don't know how to fix this heart I've managed to break. This is my story. The story of how I came much more than a directioner.

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6. Guilty love.

I am a horrible person.

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I can't believe it. I kissed Zayn Malik. We are sort of an item now. We keep it from the public. For my own safety. Zayn always does anything to protect me. But guilt still get me hard. Because every kiss every laugh every touch. Feels like a mistake.

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We walk hand in hand in a twisting neighbourhood of a town i can't remember. This is Zayn's vacation cottage. Even though we have been dating a mere week and a half he thought it would be fun since the boys had a break from work. I need to tell him to get it off my chest. That something didn't feel right. I slow to a stop. "Za-" "oh! I almost forgot to tell you!" he interrupts. "I thought I'd surprise you by telling you the rest of the boys are coming down tomorrow! They finally get to meet you!" He throws his arms up in the air. "Surprise!" I look at him with my lips slightly parted as if am going to say something but no words come out. When I'm with Zayn it doesn't feel like am with Zayn Malik from One Direction. It feels like I'm with Zayn my boyfriend. This news makes me feel like I felt right before the signing. Like am about to meet celeEbrities I have a crush on. A rush of nervous energy zooms through me. I just stand there like the idiot I am with my lips slightly parted. Zayn quickly kisses my lips and touches his right hand to my face resting his left on the small of my back. I kiss back and we kiss for a long time. I love it but there's no real spark. Zayn cuts off my thoughts by saying "I should surprise you more often"

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I am nervous. I set the table for dinner then go change. Zayn is cooking. I slip on a flowered tank top and a black high waisted skirt. I look in the mirror of Zayn's and mine room. For once I look beautiful.

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I sit on the bed of our room waiting. I hear the doorbell and the boys voices. They're joking and laughing and hugging from what I can hear. I hear footsteps and the stairs creak. A knock on the door. "come in" Zayn steps in to the room with a sexy dress shirt and jeans on. My heart did a little leap. "hey you al-" *Zayn's POV* I stopped mid sentence. So did my heart. She was wearing a black flowered tank top and a black high waisted skirt that caught her curves in all the right places. "you....... You-" She kisses my lips and fireworks go off. I can't believe how much I love this girl. How right it feels. She pulls back and says "I should look this pretty more often."

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