Buried Deep

Blades, scars, self hatred, suicide. These are things that Alexandria thinks about all the time. Shes Anorexic and she cuts. Only one thing can drive a person to this point. Bullying.


2. Josh

If your wondering what Josh did i'll get in to detail. We started as a happy cute couple. Completely and utterly in love. We would smile everytime we saw eachother. But already at this point I was developing ana. I just wasnt happy with what I saw in the mirror. Josh was extremely supportive of me. He was costantly telling me I looked beautiful. He would listen to me as I told him of the way i felt inside. He held me as I cried. He was my rock. Without him i would have fallen. As soon as my rock left i felt fast. The day Josh broke up with me it was sunny and i felt good for once. Josh had given my a quick kiss before class. As we parted Baylee said i was so lucky to have him. I was nervous. She was sugary sweet. Right before i had art i saw Baylee and Josh talking. I brushed it off. When I got to art i had a feeling she was up to something. I was right. On the way to lunch i got a text. My screen lit up with Josh<3. I smiled. Then i opened it. It read "Hey Alex! I really hate to do this but i think we need to go are own ways. I found someone who is indepentant and can stand alone. I think i need the break. Best Wishes, Josh:)" I felt the tears coming. I turned around and saw Baylee and Josh kissing. My heart shaddered. They broke apart and hugged. Baylee looked at me and smiled. I turned and headed for my locker. I threw my lunch inside and went to the Libray. It was huge. I found an empty corner and sank down and cried. I was beyond hurt. I reached into my pocket and found a pencil sharpener. I looked at it and saw the small,shiny blade. I took it out. I took a deep breath. In my head I heard "Do it! Your not good enough. You made Josh leave yoy. Your ugly and fat" These things ran through my head as I drug the blade across my wrist. It was painful but i felt good. I deserved it. I needed it. This was the start of a crazy addiction that comsumed me. Now you know Josh. Look what you caused. Happy?

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