Fault and blame

Spoilt fifteen year old Maddy lives the perfect life. Perfect looks. Perfect family. And, perfect boyfriend. But when rumours are spread as they are in high school, and she is accused of cheating, she feels like the whole world is falling apart! Will she convince them that it wasn't her fault, or will her boyfriend, Kyle, fall for someone else? ***

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3. be strong

I sat on the edge of my bed, head in hands. My parents had tried to catch me before I stumbled into my room- probably to have yet another discussion about missing breakfast, and anorexia, and my sister. I’d changed out of my school clothes into an old grey sweater that had once been blue, and had once belonged to her. Oh, how I missed Hannah. If only she were here now to comfort me. She would understand.

 My whole body was heaving. I don’t think I’d ever cried so hard in my life. I’d always had people giving me dirty looks, looking at me in the corridors back at school, but at least I still had some friends then. As the day went on, I tried to talk to Eleanor and Georgia, but they just shrugged me off. “Face it.” Georgia had said after I’d been bugging her all lunch break. “You’ve always been a slut. Kyle never deserved you in the first place”. Charli and Jasmine had been there too. I thought they were my friends, but the way they walked off laughing showed me otherwise.

Going from, supposedly, one of the most popular girls in school, to being frowned upon by everyone in just one day had been excruciating.

I got up to look at myself in my full length mirror. I was in a total state. My whole face literally looked like it had been thrown around in a washing machine, mascara running, eyeliner smudged, foundation bumpy and melting. And as for the rest of me. I had obviously forgotten to keep my skirt rolled up during the day, as it was lopsided and crumpled. I realised my legs looked fatter than ever.

Slipping off my shoes and socks, I rolled up my skirt and had a close look at my legs. I tried to get my hands around my thigh, but it only got half way. I put my knees together. A gap. But a pathetic one. How could I have only just realised this? I really shouldn’t have eaten lunch today. I shouldn’t have eaten.

 I ran to the toilet and was about to throw up. No. I couldn’t do this to myself! I would not allow myself to do what my sister did. I didn’t want to put my family in that pain again. I had to keep strong, for Jasmine. Jasmine would have wanted me to be healthy. She wouldn’t have wanted the same future for me as hers was. I took a deep breath, and composed myself. Be strong.

***

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