You know that feeling.

Everyone knows that feeling....

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You know that feeling you get inside, when nervousness is swelling in the pit of your stomach, making you want to spew. When you look down that narrow alley, big abandoned building with smashed in wooden doors and windows with wooden pallets blocking them on one side, and a wall on the over. When every shadow in the night seems to move in your path. Where every noise is a murderer. That’s how I felt right now, looking down that path. The stretch of the alley to the main

road. Not a car in sight, not a person, just darkness.

 

Every hair on the back of my neck on edge, everyone knows the feeling. Bumps forming on my arm sending tingles shooting through my body. Every reflex in my system screaming ‘you’re going to die! Don’t go down that path! Just turn around and go the long way’. Have you ever noticed, that you never listen to that instinct because when you go to turn around its like something’s going to grab you and drag you down anyway.

 

With clammy hands I begin to walk into the darkness, telling myself ‘don’t look at the building’ and yet one little glance can make you scared beyond belief. I start to speed walk down the street, breath increasing, trying to avoid looking at the windows again. Just when I think its safe I get to the corner. The only sound is my breath. Walking round the corner I bump into a girl I hardly talk to at school.

 

Paranoid and terrified we stare at each other for a minute, brain trying to tell if it’s someone I know or a murderer in disguise. Awkward silence fills the air, until my mouth utters the word “Hi...” letting out a wry smile. “Hiya...” She replies and we go our separate ways.

 

Walking round the park, it’s hard to walk straight. Hairs still raised on the back of my neck, nervousness still tugging and still certain I was going to die. My legs feel like jelly, feeling like I’m sweating all over I rub the back of my neck. ‘I’m just coming down with a cold or maybe the flu’. I repeat in my head. Then I look behind me and a woman has magically appeared behind me talking on her phone, and instantly, that makes her a kidnapper or murderer who is after me.

 

Speeding up to lose her she turns down to another street. I’m now at the top of a street with shops and it’s got 5 or 6 lampposts. The nervousness dies down again. Feeling like I can breathe again I calm and walk happily down the path. Looking in shop windows. I pass the old antique shop, every town has one. In every shop there is always the freaky doll that reminds you of some horror movie or story. This shop was one of them. The antique china dolls in their Victorian styled clothes and hair in perfect ringlets. One in particular wore glasses like the one at my nanas house. GOD those dolls scared me. All made out of the same pale peachy coloured china.

 

Then when you get to the end of your street and your house is barely in sight, it’s the best feeling in the world. All nerves vanish and you want to run into the house and snuggle up in your blanket. Calmly I walk up the street, passing the butchers shop with that irritating cut out butcher in a white and blue apron. When a car door slams. Instantly I feel like I’m sweating again, the tugging begins again and my eyes begin to throb, getting hotter and hotter as I scan for the person leaving a car.

 

When one couldn’t be located that when you always begin to think, they’re in my house. The shadows move in front of your house just as you arrive. ‘Stop being a baby you made it this far, just turn the key and your fine’. I keep telling myself but instinct shrieks its opinion. 

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