57. Wide Awake
I wake up with bright lights all around me. I can't open my eyes all the way, I can't move. All I see is white. Am I dead? I can hear a heart monitor in the room, it's slow and fading. I try to open my eyes all the way but I can't. I try to speak but I can't. I lay there, useless, unable to do anything. I hear the nurse talking to the doctor, "Is she gonna make it?" I hear him mess with the machines, "All we can do is pray. She lost a lot of blood and if it wasn't for that blood donor, she wouldn't have a chance of living." I hear them leave the room. They don't know if I'm gonna live? Why don't they know? Why can't I move or talk? I lay there trying to understand everything. Who donated blood for my surgery? Why would they do that for me? I try moving again, but nothing happens. After awhile, I hear the door open. I hear Louis crying softly by me. I feel him take my hand, and massage it with his thumb. He whispers softly into my ear, "Please Rachel. Don't die. I need you. Stella needs you. Please, just wake up. I love you." I can't stand to hear him cry. I wish I could just wake up and hold him in my arms. But, I can't. No matter how hard I try, I just can't. I sits there crying. He strokes my cheek with his hand. He sniffs away a tear a while kissing my forehead, "Please wake up, Rachel." He sits there by me for a long time, which seems like forever. I hear the door open. I hear them walk up to my bedside. One of them bends down by me and takes my hand. They cry softly, "Please Rachel. Wake up. We need you. Don't die on us." It's Harry. Another one rubs my arm, "Wake up Rachel. Come on. Just wake up." It's Niall. He starts to get angry. He shakes my arm, "Wake up Rachel?! This isn't funny?!" Harry pulls him outside when he starts yelling. It's hurts me to hear him mad at me. Just because I won't wake up. Stupid me. Why can't I just wake up?! I hear him in the hall yelling and crying. It just kills me to hear him like this. Some one walks up and takes my hand, "Rachel, it's time to wake up. Stella needs her mum. We all need you." It's Liam. Some else brushes a piece of hair out of my face, "Open your eyes. Don't leave us. Not now. Not ever." It's Zayn. I hear him and Liam crying. I start getting angry with myself. I hate hurting them like this. I hear them sit by Louis, who is still sobbing into his hands. They just sit there, crying, for me. Niall and Harry walk in and sit down too. Niall is still crying and Harry is crying softly also. Time slowly passes by, until I hear the door open. Who ever it is, sits down by me. I hear them talking to the boys. It's Amber. After awhile I hear a baby crying. It's my baby girl. Stella. She needs me. I frantically try to open my eyes. But I can't. I start getting upset with myself. I can't even help my baby who needs me. I need her. I need Louis. I need to wake up. I try one more time, this time I'm successful. I slowly open my eyes. I see everyone jump out of their seats. They walk towards me. Louis takes my hand, "Rachel. Are you awake?" I try to move my head to look at him, but my neck is stiff. I glance over at him. He has a streams of tears rolling down his face. He still has a big black bruise where they hit him in the face. He has tear stains on his face. His eyes are bloodshot, puffy, and tear filled. My eyes start watering. Just seeing him is amazing. I whisper, "I love you."