“…and now I don’t know what to do.” I finished, wiping the tears away from my cheeks and breathed.
Liam still sat beside me motionless. He hadn’t said a single word whilst I told him everything. I noticed him tense up at a few points. You could see the anger bubbling out of him when I told him about Damen rapping me. Yet he contained it and sat there starring into the lake, where now the stars reflections lay.
“Liam.” I whispered, shaking his shoulder slightly. I needed to know what he thought. He couldn’t leave me; he promised. Liam would never go back onto his promise, would he?
Within a second I found myself in the tight grip of Liam’s arms. He held me so close; I could feel the beating of his heart drumming against my own. His head rested in the crook of my neck, leaving me no choice but to wrap my arms around him. It felt good having him close to me. It felt good telling him everything that sat in my shoulders. Warmth filled me as our bodies touched, until he pulled away and cold came back once again.
“Ally… Why didn’t you tell me before?” he asked, eyebrows pulling together. I looked at the ground, but Liam tilted my chin upwards so I was looking at him. “Your turn to look at me, now. Why didn’t you tell me before?”
Tears brimmed in my eyes once more. I swear if this was the way I would be going I would cry enough tears to fill a swimming pool. I blinked my tears away and sighed, before telling him. “I didn’t tell you, because I was afraid that you would leave me. I was afraid Liam…” I trailed off.
Liam pulled me in more closer, so I was sitting in his lap. The warmth of his chest hit my back. “I would never leave you Ally. We have been through so much together for that to happen.” He whispered in my ear, resting his chin on my shoulder. It felt nice to hear those words come out of his mouth, but a part of me thought this was too easy. He can’t be all calm about it, can he?
I turned so I was facing him. “You’re not mad?” I asked, sceptical. Liam shook his head.
“Why would I be mad Ally?” he sighed. I stayed quite as I knew he was going to say something more. “None of this is your fault, and if it is not your fault then why would I have the reason to be mad at you?” I didn’t answer, but started fiddling with my fingers.
“But I didn’t tell you soon enough…” I started to say.
“But you told me now, and that’s all that matters.” Liam said, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear.
“What about the baby?” I whispered.
“Ally, I will always be there by your side. If the baby is his…” Liam trailed of, but got his courage to speak again. “If the baby is his, then I will treat it as my own. We will have a little family together.” He finished.
“Look over there.” My gaze followed Liam’s hand to where he was pointing. Right there was a mother and father sitting on the grass, underneath the starry sky. In between them both was a little girl, picking daises of the ground. She looked about three years old. He mother patted her hair and her father laughed, throwing bits of grass at her. The little girl giggled; it was the most heavenly sound. Her laughter immediately bought happiness.
“We’ll have that someday.” Liam whispered, his breath tickling my neck. “Imagine me and you in the place of those parents.” That’s exactly what I did, I imagined Liam sitting there messing around with the little girl - our daughter. I imagined myself pulling my daughter closer to me, shielding her from the thrown grass. A small smile spread across my lips.
“Now imagine a little boy or girl; our son or daughter in between us.” Liam mumbled. I imagined the little boy to look exactly like Liam. The same hairs, the same eyes, even the same smile. The little girl however would have my eyes, but everything else of Liam’s. The perfect child and it would be ours. “I will always be there beside you, and we will have our own little family.” He breathed. “Whether the baby is mine or not.” I turned to face him, tearing my eyes of the family.
“It will be yours.” I said quietly, cupping his face.
“I’m hoping the same thing, Ally.” Liam smiled. “Until we don’t know, let’s say it is mine.” His expression suddenly changed; he looked pained.
“Liam, what’s wrong?” I asked.
He ran his fingers through his hair before wrapping his arms around me again. “I’m just angry at myself.” He thought. “It’s my entire fault.” I shook my head to protest, but Liam stopped me.
“If I didn’t leave you, he wouldn’t have come.” He told me.
“No one could have determined when he was going to come or not.” I defended Liam.
“Ally, even if he did come, I could have protected you. He wouldn’t have r-ra…” He trailed off. Liam couldn’t even say the word rapped. “I’m so stupid.” He stated. I stated to shake my head again.
“No Liam.” I protested.
“Yes I am. I should have noticed all the signs. I should have understood what you’re eating habits meant. I should have asked you about the change in your behaviour. I should have known, but I didn’t.” Liam had tears brimming in his eyes, threatening to come out. I lifted my palms to wipe them away.
“Liam, none of this is your fault.” I reassured him.
We slowly walked home hand in hand. The starts sparkled above and the light wind sounded like music to my ears. It was cold and soon, my teeth started shattering. I hugged myself to keep some warmth. Now I really wish I brought a jacket.
“I know your cold.” He said taking of his jacket. “Here put this on.” I looked at the jacket he was handing me and then back at him.
“Liam, you’ll get cold like that.” I argued. Another breeze passed, sending shivers down my spine.
“I’ll be fine.” He said, gently tugging the jacket on me. “You need it more than I do.” Zipping it up, he tugged the hood over my head. “And I don’t want our baby getting ill, now do we?” he asked, one eyebrow rose. I smiled at him. The way he said ‘our baby’ brought tingles to my tummy. I looked down at it and rubbed circles onto it. It was ‘our baby’ and always will be.
Liam took my hand him his once again and we continued walking. “Ally?” he asked.
“Yeah?” I replied looked back at him.
“You know the note you were talking about, and the report?” I nodded. “Where are they?” he asked.
“Louis has them.” I stated. “This reminds me. I think you have some apologising to do.” I stopped in my tracks and looked at him. “Assuming that I and he were having an affair wasn’t exactly wise.” I told him, coming closer so we were centimetres away.
“I guess you’re right.” He sighed. “I’ll do it as soon as I see him.” I smiled at his plan.
“Good boy.” I tiptoed up and kissed him on his forehead.
“Hey, save that for our son.” He laughed.
“That’s if we have a son. You never know, we might have a beautiful baby girl.” I teased.
“If we do, she’ll look just. Like. You.” He smiled, bringing his lips to mine.
“If we have a son, he’ll look just. Like. You.” I replied mocking him. Liam smiled and pressed his lips to mine, moving in sync.