A better life - One direction

My life is a mess. My only reason to be here, is my brother.
Oh, by the way. My name is Tracy Evans. My life isn't that exiting.
Well, at least I thought so..

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12. The horrible news.

 

 

Chapter 12.

Tracy's P.O.V.

It was a nightmare. An absolute nightmare. I don't know how long I sat on the damn chairs, in the damn hallway, in the damn hospital. An hour at least – maybe two? I don't know. It felt like days.

What was wrong with Kyle? How can he just faint like that? Didn't he get enough to drink, that day? Was he getting the flu? I didn't know. I hope it isn't worse, than a flu. But... How can a check last that long, if it's only a flu?

“Miss Tracy Evans?” A doctor suddenly said. “Yes, that's me”. He didn't look that happy. What's going on?

“Well... I got good news and bad news” he said. “Give me the bad first”. “I think you wanna know the good ones first”. My heart started beating faster. “Okay”

“Kyle's okay. He's awake, and you can see him”. I slowly started to cheer up. “And the bad ones?”

The doctor looked at the ground for a second, while taking a deep breath.

“Miss Evans.. Your brother, Kyle, he's got a very bad heart disease. It stopped working optimal. His heart rhythm is unstable. Sometimes it beats to fast, and sometimes to slow. When it beats to slow he'll get dizzy, and most of the times, faint. That's what happened today.” I started to tear up.

“But... You can do something, right? You can save him, right? He'll be okay!” I cried.

“I'm so sorry. But this disease is incurable. There's nothing I, or anybody else, can do. There hasn't been discovered a cure, yet. And I doubt there ever will be.”

This couldn't be happening. My only brother, the only family I had left, was soon being taken away from me. My mind couldn't take this. I rushed pas the doctor, and into Kyle's room.
He just laid there, looking. At nothing. Like there wasn't anything in the room, at all.

“Kyle?” I sniffled. He turned his head to look at me. “Come here” he said. I rushed to the bed, and leaned in to give him a hug. He made a move for me to lay down besides him. I laid my head on his chest and wrapped my arm round his stomach. He held me close. Like he use to do, when I was crying. He had a tight grip on my body, letting me know, that he's here to protect me, and that nothing can hurt me, as long as I'm in his arms. But this time, it was different. It was like... A cry for help. For me to save him. For me to find a cure, so that he could live. But I couldn't. And with that thought, I started to sob at his chest, making his hospital dress all wet. I cried for a long time. I just couldn't stop. All my feelings were just pouring out of my mind. It kinda felt good to let it all out. I didn't really cried that much when my mum died. I didn't want to act week in front of Kyle. Cause he was crying. A lot. So I had to cheer him up, and I couldn't if I was also crying. But right now, it was my turn to cry. My turn to sob. My turn to feel depressed, to feel sad, to feel like there's nothing more to live for. There wasn't. Kyle was all I lived for. He was all I had. And he's soon being taken away from me. Then I'm gonna be alone, like I have always felt I was. But this time, for real. I was going to be alone. On my own. By myself. And I don't think I can handle it.

After about an hour, the crying took off. The top of my head was all wet too, from Kyle's tears.

This was all too much.

“Kyle?” - “Yes, love?” I hesitated for a second. “You can't die. If you die, so will I. I don't want to live, without you!” I said. I felt his strong hands lifting my head up, for me to look in his eyes. They were full of sorrow, and all teared up. But they also had a very strict look.

“Tracy, through all these years I've tried my best, not to act like I'm your father. Cause I'm not, I never will be, and I don't want to be. I'm your big brother, I'm here to protect you, to listen to you, and to love you. And most importantly, I'm here to make you be happy. And to make sure, that you'll only receive the best in life. But, I failed to give you the best. You've never had a father. Your mum died when you were very young. And now, I'm going to leave you, too. Even though I always promised you, that I never would. That you could count on me every minute of your life. But I'll tell you one thing. It'll get better. A lot better. Cause, Trace... You've found him. You've found the guy who can make you laugh, like nobody else can. The guy who can make you smile, even when you don't want to. The guy, who'll give his whole life up, to make sure you're safe. The guy who makes your eyes sparkle, when ever you just think of him. You found your prince charming. You found happiness, safeness... My sweet little sister. You found love. And love is the most beautiful and precious thing, in the whole world. So, you know what? You are not dying with me. I won't let you. This is the only thing, I have ever decided for you and it will be the only thing. You are going to continue living – with Niall. Cause, I may be leaving this world, but I'll never leave you. I'll stay in your heart forever and always. I'll watch you from where ever it is I am going. I'm not leaving you permanently. Mum didn't either. She's watching us, making sure we're okay.” he stopped for a second, I think it was the thought of mum that made him sad. “I love you Tracy. I always will. You're my everything. So please, live your life, and don't waste any time, okay? Do it for me? They said that I got about 3 months left. Please spend them with me”

The tears kept on rolling down my cheeks, and so did it on Kyle's. I didn't know what to say. I was without words. Everything he just said. Every single word was carved into my heart, it was something I would never forget. But he was right. I couldn't just leave the life I was just started liking. I couldn't leave Niall. So, I decided to do as Kyle told me. I was going to live my life – with the one I love. But first of all, I was going to make the last time Kyle had left, amazing.

 

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