Gotta Be You

I know how they both feel and now all that’s left to do is to find out how I feel.

And right now, my heart is stuck in the middle of a tug-o-war. Niall pulling hard on one side and Harry pulling just as hard on the other.

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16. Whatever It Takes

Harry’s POV

 

I had just left Isla’s room when I was surrounded by the rest of the group and was bombarded with questions.

“How is she?”

“Is she okay?”

“What did she say?”

“Can we see her?”

“What happened?”

“Umm…yeah, she okay, um…I told her you guys wanted to see her. Go ahead, I’ll tell you guys what happened later. I have to, um…talk to Niall,” I said, suddenly realizing what just happened and how it’s going to affect everything. Especially things between me and Niall. If anything, I was left more confused than I was before I talked to her.

“I think you should,” Liam said, “just call me if things get…you know, bad.”

I just nodded and headed towards the direction that Niall stormed off to. I just walked around, looking everywhere where Niall might be. I don’t think he would’ve left the hospital because I know that he wants to see Isla. I had been walking around for about 10 minutes when I decided to look for a washroom since I needed to go.

I found one around the corner and walked in and was surprised when I saw Niall hunched over the sink with his head down and his hands on the counter. He didn’t know it was me since he didn’t look up so I cleared my throat.

He looked up at me through the reflection on the mirror and I saw that his eyes were all red and puffy. I felt horrible. I was just in his girlfriend’s room kissing her and he was here crying his eyes out. I’m a horrible person.

“What?” he asked me.

We were just staring at each other, me not knowing what to say.

“Are you happy now? You got what you wanted. You have Isla now,” he said.

Those words hurt me.

“You know that’s not true and that was not my intention,” I said nervously, “I don’t know what to say about the whole Isla thinking that we’re still together thing but I wanted to tell you that I am deeply sorry about kissing her at your place. It wasn’t right and I didn’t mean for you to get hurt.

“You mean you didn’t mean for me to find out,” he retorted, “right?”

“Niall, no. If I could take it back, I would, I really would,” I said, “it would mean that you wouldn’t hate me and this wouldn’t have happened to Isla. I blame myself for everything. I deserve it that you hate me. I just wanted you to know that I really am sorry.”

He didn’t say anything but he looked like he was in deep thought.

“I don’t…hate you. I’m just angry, mostly with myself,” he said. “It was my fault too. I should’ve let her explain. I just thought that I was going to lose her to you.”
Even though it hurts me to say it but I had to tell him what she told me that night.

“She loves you, Niall. She told me. She loves you more than anything. She doesn’t have feelings for me anymore,” I said. “You’re her everything.”

“Really?” he said. I could see his reflection on the bathroom mirror and saw him smile. But then it slowly went away. “But that’s not the case anymore, is it? She doesn’t remember. She doesn’t love me anymore.”

“She does. She just doesn’t remember. And we will do anything we can to help her remember,” I said, sadly, “she's happy with you. And that’s all I want for her.”

Finally, he turned around and looked at me face-to-face.

“I just wanna know,” he began, “why did you kiss her?”

I looked away. I didn’t know how to tell him but he has the right to know.

“I just…missed her. I was lonely and she’s the only person I ever loved. I know that’s not an excuse but…I just…did it,” I said, “and I’m not proud of it. I should’ve known nothing good would come out of it, even for me. Again, I’m sorry.”

I looked up at him and saw an expressionless face. He just nodded.

“Do you still have feelings for her?” he asked, “right now?”

I thought about it carefully. Too many things have happened and my thoughts were all over the place.

“I-I don’t know,” I said, shaking my head.

Niall took a deep breath and crossed his arms.

“Ok, well, it doesn’t really matter right now,” he said, “she doesn’t remember us together, she thinks that you two are still together. But, like you said, I will do anything to make her remember.”

He stared at me intently with the last sentence he said.

“I understand,” was all I said.

“But right now, we have to do what the doctor says,” he said, “I don’t want her to go back into a coma and possibly not be able to wake up.”

He paused and looked like he didn’t want to say what was on his mind.

“So if that means that if she remembers that you two are still together, then I have to accept that. Even though I don’t want to. But I just want her to be better,” he said, he took a deep breath, “I will let you be together for the month. But after a month, we are going to tell her, no matter what. Okay?”

I was astonished with what he just said.

“Look, me and Isla don’t have to be together. I…I can break up with her. I can’t do that to you,” I said. This was not how I imagined this conversation was going to go. I thought that Niall would be pissed at me, telling me that me and Isla can never be together again.

“No. That’ll just hurt her and who knows what could happen to her. Well, I mean she could go back into a coma,” Niall said. “Like I said, I will have to do anything to make her better. Even if it means that I have to let her go.” Tears started to build up in his eyes.

“I still don’t think that I can do this to you but just know that I will only be with her to make her better, I have no intention of hoping that we will be together after a month. I know that after this, when she remembers, you and her will be together again,” I said. A part of me didn’t know if I was telling the truth though.

“I can accept that,” he said. He paused for a while then spoke again, “just promise me some things.” He seemed kind of uncomfortable.

“Okay, anything,” I said.

“I know this is really awkward to talk about but…please don’t…don’t have sex with her,” he said.

I was surprised at what he said and took me a while to understand. I know that I would want the same thing if I were in his place. Who would want to go around thinking that their girlfriend might be having sex with their best friend? Regardless of Isla not remembering.

“Of course,” I said quickly, “I promise.”

“Also, just try not to be affectionate with her in front of me,” he said sadly, “I don’t think I can handle it.”

That was what I was worried about. I don’t know how I’d be able to be with Isla with Niall seeing. It would hurt him.

“I promise,” I said.

All he did was nod but I saw that he was hurting inside.

“She wants to see you,” I said. He looked up at me with bright eyes.

“She does?” he asked.

“Yeah, I told her that everyone was here except you cause you were at an interview. I didn’t want to tell her what the truth cause, you know…” I said, “but yeah, everyone else is seeing her now but they must be done. I told her that you’d come see her after.”

“Ok, thanks,” he said, “I’m just gonna wash up and I’ll be right there. I’ll meet you there.”

“Alright,” I said, “thanks for talking to me.”

“Thank you, too. I know this is hard for you, too,” he said, “it’s just hard for me to take it all in right now. But I just want to focus on Isla getting better.”

“Same here,” I said, “alright. Well, I’ll see you in a bit.”

He nodded and I turned around and exited the washroom. I was walking back to Isla’s room when I remembered that I had to go to the washroom. So I looked for another one. When I was finished, I started heading towards Isla’s room.

Once I got there, I saw Liam, Zayn, Danielle and Perrie outside.

“Hey, did you find him?” Zayn asked.

“Yeah, and we had a good talk,” I replied, “things are a bit better between us. I’ll explain later. He’s on his way to see her. You guys have gone in to talk to her?”

“Yeah, Lou and El just went in,” Danielle said. I nodded. About a minute later, I saw Niall walking towards us. Liam and Zayn walked up to him.

“Hey, buddy,” Liam said, “you alright?”

“Yeah,” he replied, “I mean, good as I can be.” Liam nodded in understanding.

“We missed you,” Zayn said, messing up his hair. “Don’t you ever walk out on me again, mister,” Zayn joked, wagging his finger at him for extra effect, trying to cheer him up. It worked, Niall smiled at him.

“Yes, mom,” Niall said. Everyone laughed as Lou and El came out of the room.

“Niall!” Lou said as he ran up to him and gave him a huge hug, “where in heavens have you been? You had me all worried. Don’t you ever do that again.”

“Don’t worry, Lou. I already had the talk with him,” Zayn said.

“You guys are crazy,” Niall said, smiling and shaking his head.

“Anyways, we heard you when we were talking to Isla,” El said, “she wants to see you.” She smiled at him politely.

He took a deep breath and nodded.

“Alright, here I go,” he said. He walked up to the door and placed his hand around the doorknob. He opened the door and went inside.

Before he closed the door, I heard him say:

“Isla.”

 

**********

 

So anyways a few things to say:

1) if any of you want to talk, kik me at livelaughlove47

2) Be my fan and i will pick people to be a part of my future stories, or a small part in this story, or i might start doing one shots with the boys :) so please be my fan

3) Please be more polite with your comments about me updating. You guys can ASK me when i'm going to update but also comment something about my story, what you just read, not just asking about the next part. I love reading your comments. Honestly, i look to see whether people comment on my story more than i look at the number of likes

4) Still accepting any takers on anyone who would want to make me a trailer for this story, if you want to, kik me so i can discuss what i want it to be like and then you can be the main character for one of my other story ideas that i have and you can pick whether you want to be with Liam, Louis or Zayn

Anyways, thanks for reading, and thanks for liking :)

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