Into the Blue

Evelyn is a surfer who lives in the sunny state of California. As she is preparing for nationals, she puts all of her heart, mind and soul into focusing on trying to win and get sponsored, but hits a small bump in the road. On top of that, when teaching surf lessons she meets some boys that only complicate things a little more. Life isn't meant to be perfect and she knows she will soon have to make a choice. Be with the boy that has transformed her life forever, or stick with surfing, the thing that has made her who she is.

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15. Hospital

I woke up in a white room. Again.

I rubbed my head with one hand and tried taking deep breaths, but felt like I was inhaling metallic machinery. Pools of water dared to seep out of the corners of my eyes but I looked up to the ceiling and kept them in. I wouldn't. Not today. I was stronger than that. I sat feeling as if my chest was being weighted down. I tried to breathe normally but my lungs didn't seem to respond. A nurse came in after a long 5 minutes and checked my machine that I was hooked up to. She put on oxygen mask on me and instantly I felt relief. She was talking to me but all I could hear was my heart rate beeping, hot air filling the space between my nose and mask. I felt clammy and uncomfortable. The itchy gown making me squirm, the iv's pulling at my skin, the smell of cleaning products overcoming the room. I tried blocking everything out and focusing on a song, thought or anything in my head, but nothing would go away. Especially the sound of my heart beat. I swear you could have heard it from a mile away. I looked down to the ground feeling defeated. How fragile life was. People always said it, but now that I knew what it felt like, they couldn't be more right. My life had changed so quickly. Besides my health, meeting all the boys. The boys. Liam. I immediately pulled my face into my hands, my fingers hitting the plastic mask that rest on my nose. I remember us fighting. Or more me yelling at him. Why did I do that? Why did I build those walls. Was I really that afraid of someone coming into my life and actually making me.. happy? Or was it just that I thought surfing was the only thing that could bring me such joy. All he was trying to do was help. And I rejected it. I dropped my hands and noticed the nurse had left. What had she even been saying? Hopefully nothing too important.

The doctor came in right after and looked at me, the machine, then back at me. It wasn't doctor Mathews, but a man. Older with grey hairs starting to form around his ears. "Hi I'm doctor Richards" Typical doctor name. "How are you feeling?" He said as he pulled up a chair next to my bed. Great. He has to sit down to tell me the news. I looked at him. Was this a regular thing? Did he have to tell awful news to teenagers all the time? Did it ever take a toll on him? Was it hard? By the look in his eyes, the way he sighed with furred eyebrows, I was not ready to hear anything come out of his mouth.

"fine" I lied. Geeze what did he think?? I didn't even recognize my voice. It sounded raspy; and no, not in a sexy way. I'm exhausted. And tired. Tired of being tired. I think about how dumb I was to even go night surfing. I had to save my energy to train! For Nationals!! Surfing is the most important thing to focus on and I need to put everything into it. 

Right?

"Well it seems like you've been over working your body." He said crossing his arms and pulling me back to reality. "Apparently you were night surfing when you fainted?" he asked. I looked at the ground ashamed to answer. I don't know how many times doctor Mathews had told me to take it easy, but obviously it looked like I didn't listen. "And you cut yourself pretty badly." he said nodding towards to arm. "You lost a lot of blood which didn't help." Awesome. I had forgotten about that. I looked to see my whole forearm covered in bandages. Just another thing to worry about I thought, mentally slapping my self for again being an idiot.

Or was I? Before the drama had happened last night I was having fun. A lot of fun. Did I regret being here? Did I regret going out when I wasn't supposed to? Two parts inside me tore against each other.

"I.." he paused. "I don't know how much longer you can keep surfing" Doctor Richards said. My heart dropped. I felt like some one had just punched me in the throat and my air could barley squeeze though to my lungs.

"What?" I asked with a quivering voice.

"You were really close to-" He cuts off.

"I was really close to what?" I ask, my blood starting to boil as my nervousness quickly turned to anger.

"We just can't have you risk your life like that again." he said with sympathy in his eyes. "Your friends were not very smart in thinking that you could handle more. They should have thought about what they were doing."

"So you are telling me to basically become a couch potato?" I ask as my voice rises as I pull of the oxygen mask. I definitely didn't need help breathing now. "Doctor I live for surfing. You can't take that away from me! I live for being outside and active!! Already 'taking it easy' has been hard enough. If you tell me not to surf, I will not listen. I will keep surfing." I said crossing my arms. "I don't care. I have to surf. It is a part of me. And 'What they were doing?'" I said quoting furiously in the air. "They were being my friends! They wanted me to forget about this. Forget that I am not the same girl that I used to be. Forget that I have to worry. Forget that I have to be cautious. It was not their fault. All they were doing was trying to help. You know nothing about them. I love them for trying." Well I guess I knew what side was winning. I would have never have said that before. I was too concerned with surfing to even think about doing something fun. But maybe I liked being able to have fun and not have to think professionally for a second.

Richards slumps in his seat looking defeated. He presses his lips together as he is thinking. I notice how hard my face is and how my fists are clenched to the sides. My heart rate on the machine has sky rocketed and I take a second and realize what I've done. I release my white fingers and soften my face.

"I'm sorry." I let out quietly. "I overreacted." He looks up with confusion in his eyes as I closed my eyes and let out a breath.

"I am just... not used to this" I say almost in a question. "Everything has just happened so fast. And I guess I'm having a hard time adjusting. And I am just defensive of my friends. I don't want them to take the heat. They were just trying to help." I whisper out. "I should have been more careful" I say playing with my fingers.

He lets out a sigh and stands up. "No I am sorry for accusing your friends. They haven't even left the hospital and I can tell how much they care. Its touching really." He says smiling. "Nothing like this is every easy. And I don't want you to stop living life. I just want to make sure you can live your life. To the end." he said emphasizing. He puts his hand on my shoulder and says gently. "30 minutes at most. And nothing else. Keep coming in for your blood transfusions and drink a lot of water. Change out your bandages every day. I'll have the nurse set up an checkup appointment for your arm" he says as he gives a small smile. "No more surfing by the coral." He said shaking his head like a father would. I nod in agreement smiling as he walks away. "Oh Evelyn." he adds as his hand is on the door knob. "Would you like your friends to come see you? They are quiet worried." I give a slight nod. "Alright. Take care hun." he says as he closes the door.

I notice my heart rate has gone back down and wipe the few tears that have escaped. So much for that plan. I put the mask back on and try to relax. The only question is, which mask did I put on? My oxygen mask? Or my mask that covered my emotions. That covered how I was scared out of my mind, lost and confused with my situation and I did not know how to handle it. I hear a slight knock at the door and see Tam's face through the window. I smile as she turns the knob.

"Evy" She says rushing next to me and pulling me in for a hug. I wrap my arms around her and realize how grateful I am to have her. I open my eyes to see all the boys there too, besides Will. Liam stands behind the rest looking around, not making eye contact.

"How's Will?" I ask, playing with my fingers again. That was something I tended to do often. Especially if I ever felt awkward; and when 6 boys are staring at you in a hospital gown, It feels a little strange. Which it shouldn't, because its not like I wasn't used to attention. I would get noticed for being a surfer all the time. And these guys were my friends. Why was I feeling shy? My teenage emotions need to get their act together.

"Lets just focus on you getting better yeah?" Zayn said.

"Ha" I let out. "I guess."

"That was really scary." Niall said sitting down on the bed. "I swear I thought I would faint next." he said fanning his face dramatically.

"I don't think we've ever been in such a demanding situation like that before." Louis adds. "So much was going on and then you had to faint of all things" He said rolling his eyes.

"Sorry." I laugh out. "I'll try not to next time."

"Still cracking jokes? You do realize you are in a hospital." Harry said smirking. I was going to say a comeback, but I didn't' have the energy and just let out a small laugh through my nose. Gosh why couldn't Liam say something. I just wanted to hear his voice. I wanted him to make me feel those butterflies, that fuzzy feeling in my body that was so foreign. I had missed that feeling, but I would never admit that to anyone. I was perfectly fine by myself.

"Will has to stay here for a couple of days." Louis said. "He has some pretty bad cuts on the sides of his legs and he isn't going to be able to surf or do anything really for the next few weeks. He has a huge brace around his thigh and it looks so funny. And he looks kind of awkward when he moves" he said as his face lit up laughing. Zayn rolled his eyes and smacked him on the back of the head.

"I will literally go lodge your ass in the coral" Zayn said.

"I'd like to see you try" Louis said scoffing.I just smiled. I swear they fought like brothers, but it was so adorable I didn't want them to stop.

"I think the nurse was saying you could get discharged tomorrow morning." Harry added as his green eyes made eye contact with me. His smiled warmed my heart as is grew bigger as I stared at him.

"Good." I said clearing my throat. Gosh you'd think I had a sore throat. "I want to get out of here as soon as possible." I said as they smiled in return. "You guys can go home. I can handle myself till the morning. You all look beat."

"Is that the nice way of telling us we look like crap? Cause I'm pretty sure the sleepy look looks hella sexy on me" Niall said raising an eyebrow then grinning widely.

I laughed, feeling a little bit normal. "Yep you guys are too sexy for me to handle. Its making me more tired to even look at you!!" I said pushing the back of my hand to my forehead and throwing my head back. "I'll see you guys tomorrow." I said waving them to the door.

"I called your mom but you should probably call her. She's freaking out a little." Tami said pulling my phone out of her bag and handing it to me as she gave me a hug.

"What mom wouldn't be??" Zayn said as he gave me a hug next.

"Take care buttercup." Niall said as he hugged me.

"Buttercup?" I asked arching an eyebrow.

"First thing that came to my head. And I'm hungry." he said turning around.

"See ya E" Lou said as he answered the phone giving me a sideways hug.

"Try not to hurt yourself any more?" Harry asked as he pulled me into a hug, his curls brushing past my face as he held me tightly.

"Ha I'll try." I said as I pulled away.

Liam stood with his hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on his heels.

"Um... lets go." Tami said making eye contact with me and then pushing the boys out. Harry narrowed his eyes at Liam then made eye contact with me. I smiled to try and reassure him that everything would be fine, but his mouth staying in a thin taunt line and he left the room.

Liam stared at me, his brown eyes burning a hole in my heart. I tried not to think about our little situation that had happened, but it wouldn't leave my brain, and I started feeling sick to my stomach. His face was confused as he cocked his head to the side and let out a sigh.

"Liam-"

"Why?" he asked cutting me off.

"Why?" I repeated.

"Why are you shutting me out?" He asked taking a step closer.

My head started to hurt, and the turning in my stomach grew immensely.The last thing I wanted to do was talk about why I built walls against people, but I knew we couldn't leave this.

"Liam I barley know you. We met what, a week ago??" I said a little to harshly. Hurt clouded his eyes as he looked around the room. "Did you expect me to open up to you just like that??"

"I expected you to be nice." He said bluntly. He paused as if waiting for me to say something, but really I didn't know what to say. "That's not what I meant." He said as he filled the awkward silence. "You are nice but geeze Evy I was just trying to help you. That's what FRIENDS do." I flinched at the words friends. But why should I? Just like I said we barley knew eachother. I didn't expect anything else. But the word still stung.

"They help each other. Could you really be that bold headed to refuse my help?" he asked. "Or is a pride thing?' he said taking a step closer. "Because you're a girl surfer and you don't want to be seen as weak and fragile so you think you can only do everything on your own?" I swallowed as I looked down at my fingers again, stumped and at a loss for words. "Help me understand." But I didn't want him to. I didn't want to pull him into the mess that I was wrapped up in. I didn't want to be that burden to him. I couldn't.

"Having someone help you doesn't mean you've failed." He whispered as I looked up. He stood right next to my bed. His hand reached out and pushed a stray hair behind my ear. "It just means you're not in it alone." I could barley hear him. Besides the fact that he said it so quietly, his fingers brushing my ear sent my body into a rigid pose and I couldn't move. He sounded so vulnerable. So weak. Something I hadn't seen out of him. But I liked it. His face was soft and lost as if he was searching for an answer. But again no words came out. I couldn't tear my gaze from his eyes as he kept waiting for an answer.

"Friendship takes a lot more than one week." I said as I swallowed and pulled away from his fingers that I so desperately wanted to touch.

He let out a small sigh and laughed through his nose looking down at the ground then raising his eyes back up to mine. "Whatever it takes" he said as he smiled and walked out of the room leaving me speechless.

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Hehe things are going to get interesting soon. It has been a million years since I updated sooo sorry. But I started school and work and it has been HECTIC to say the least. But I really am going to be committed to this and try and update a least once a week (which for me sounds like a miracle cause I'm awful at updating) because I feel like you guys deserve it :) but thank you for sticking with the story. I love your support so much and am so grateful for it! x-m.rose

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