An Impossible Love

Mandy met the love of her life, by fate,Harry styles. Everything happened through Skype, will that be the beginning of something real?

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49. Everything Has Changed

 

Mandy’s P.O.V:

 

I was feeling down, not just because all the harry situation, but because of aunt Nina, it hurts so much feeling her like that with me, we used to have an amazing relationship and knowing that I messed up and ruined the image she had of me, kills me to know I let her down. She’s a sweetheart, the most loving person but in cases like these, she’s very strict and takes things seriously, I know she’s sad, that’s the way she proves she’s disappointed, I had to make something about it.

 

‘’Mandy, are you home?’’- I heard her yelling from the kitchen. ‘’Yeah aunt Nina, I’m here’’- I shouted back, I waited for another response of her, but she didn’t. I heard how she was accommodating the groceries in the pantry, so I went to the kitchen to meet her.

 

‘’See this is really affecting me, I know you have all the reasons to be mad, sad, and disappointed at me, I know I deserve all the things that are already happening to me, I don’t want you to agree or accept my wrong decisions or my ‘’misbehaving’’, all I want, it’s my aunt Nina back, I really need you, it’s hard for me to deal with the pain of losing Harry everywhere I go and keep all the hurt to myself, I need you to help me settle down, but the way you’re treating me lately.. i..’’ –  she interrupted me by hugging me tight, ‘’Ladybug, I know I’ve been kind of harsh on you, it’s not like I did it intentionally but in some way you actually deserved it, I’m no one to punish you for your actions, you are an adult, and if I got hurt was basically because of that, I wasn’t expecting any other behavior of you, anything less than how an adult should act, it was very disappointing yes, of course it was, you’re not in high school, he’s not a next door kid, he’s someone that loves you to death, that cares about you, was once your best friend, and became your fiancée. I know you’re not having the time of your life right now, but I needed time to swallow and deal with the fact of Harry calling me every night telling me..-  I was shocked by all her words but when she said Harry called her every night I was frozen, ‘’What? What you mean Harry calls you every night?’’ – I asked her surprised, ‘’Well yes Amanda, the boy it’s miserable, he’s still doesn’t want to make a scene in his family, he doesn’t want to tell his mom you guys are broken up, and I said CALLED me, he doesn’t call me anymore, guess he’s moving on, or trying to, but he really cares about you..’’ – she replied sighing, ‘’ but don’t worry ladybug, I won’t say I’m not mad at you, but you are my little girl and that won’t change, I just hope you make the right choices about all this..’’ – I stared at her eyes and hugged her tight at me, she definitely knew what to say, and how to say them to me, she was completely right. ‘’Aunt nina, I should be going I have something to do right now, I think I’ll come back soon’’ – I said pulling her back so she could face me, she nodded, I went to my room, took my purse, my keys and went downstairs, got in the car and drove my way to Harry’s apartment.

 

A whole bunch of emotions were driving myself insane, it would be the first time I see his face since the moment he left heart broken, a lot of questions were inside my mind, How would he treat me? How would he react by seeing me? Will he talk to me again after this? All I knew is I was nervous the anxiety was cooking my brain; my hands were sweating on the wheel, I had the radio off so I could focus on the road and calm myself down a little before meeting him. That was a sad situation; I was about to go inside our space, to take my stuff like some kind of I don’t know, whore? And maybe just maybe never see his face again?, I was fighting not to cry, impotence was ruling me and it was not the time to let that happen.

 

I was already parked in front of his building, something was pulling me back, something was telling me not to go upstairs, not to knock at his door, not to stare at his mind blowing eyes, and drove back home, and hide underneath my blanket. There I was, acting like a little girl, trying to scape of the consequences of a very ‘’adult’’ wrong choice. I shook my head counted to 3, opened the door and ran inside the building, said ‘’Hi’’ to the receptionist and got in the elevator. The elevator felt like some kind of amusement park ride, long and hysterically depressing.

 

 

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