The Direction Love Travels (Editing in process)

(A book based on the future 2016) Nichole Styles is on her way to her annual summer vacation spot to see her brother Harry and his Four friends. She has done this every summer since she was little. This year she brings her friend Bella Salvator with her for her 18th birthday and her 6th summer with the guys. She had been in love with Niall since the day she met him. Will she get to be with him? Or will her many secrets scare him away? Will she be able to live with her secrets, or will she tell them all? Bella falls in love with Harry.. And Louis..and both have a thing for her. Who will she choose and what will it cause? With secrets to keep hidden, decisions to be made and love to be expressed, This summer may just be the most interesting one yet.

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19. We All Cope In Our Own Ways

   Harry stormed into the empty house. It felt good to be alone for once and not have everybody teering at him. He took a deep breath and let the scenery sink in. He began to cry. Hisife was slowly crashing down on him. He ran his hand through his curly brown hair and cried. He missed his little sister, he missed his love. Harry felt incomplete, he felt alone. He stuffed his hands into his pockets and looked up at the ceiling letting out a long sigh. Soon everybody was back at Summer house, the parents decided it best that they returned home. Niall sat at the edge of the table in the living room and stared at the wall half expecting to see her magically appear before him. Even though she was gone, Niall couldn't deny the fact that he felt that she was still here with him...watching him from afar. Tears were still streaming down his face. His eyes were bloodshot and swollen. Harry sat down beside him and placed his hand in his shoulder. He handed something to him. Niall looked down in his lap to see kaylynns diary.

"she wrote something in there for you" he explained.

Niall looked from Harry down to the diary in his lap.

"go on read it.." Harry insisted.

Niall opened the journal to the last page and read each word with a keen eye.

"Dear diary,             

     I'm not saying that at some point love isn't staying up until two am talking to eachother on the phone or stealing kisses when they least expect it or instantly falling for eachothers favorite song, because it is. Or at least that's what the lead up to it feels like. But real love is so much more. It's going out at 12 am to get something to eat for your lover when she can't get out of bed. It's listening to them while they explode with vulnerability on ur living room couch  About how messed up their life is. It's remembering how she likes her coffee in the morning without asking. It's visiting the one you love in the hospital knowing that it may just be your last day together.its wanting to be with that person despite their future, present and past and everything in between. In the time i thought i was in love, I was really just on my way to it. I want to let you know, Niall, I love you with all my heart, you've made the last few months of my life the best ones yet. thank you, promise me one thing, promise me that..."

the entry was not finished. He looked up to Harry who shrugged. "don't ask me I have no clue" he said. Niall flipped through each page trying to find the rest of the entry or some sort of clue as to what his promise to keep was. Harry patted nialls back and stood up and walked away. Niall took the diary to his and kaylynns room. He walked into her closet and pulled out her favorite blue shirt. He closed his eyes and breathed in her scent. She smelt of vanilla and well love. He sat on their bed and held the shirt and diary close to his chest hugging them tightly. He began to cry again as he lay in fetal position in the bed.

                                                             **********************

LOuis felt Harry's stares burning holes into his back. He turned around and gave Harry a hard stare back. Harry rolls his eyes at Louis And turns away. Louis held Bella tight in his arms as she cried.

"she was my best friend!!" bella cried. "I should have stopped her I bet she'd still be Alive if I hadn't let her drink so much that night! I should have stopped her!" she continued.Bella was starting to Blame herself for her best friends death.

"no love please stop, this isnt your fault... it was just her time..." louis whispered calmly.

bella buried her face into his chest "i should have stopped her"

"bella... i dont think her drinking made her life any shorter than it was going to be. please stop blaming yourself.. why do you do this?" he asked hugging her tightly.

bella shrugged. "do what?" she sniffled.

"blame yourself for everything?" he continued. bella burrowed her head into his chest and remained silent. she prayed to the high heavens that he wouldnt bring up her parents. louis too remained quiet and held the girl he loved with all of his heart in his arms.

                                      ***********************************

liam walked to his room sluggishly. he felt like a big tired sad blah. he shut his door behind him and reached under the bed for his little black box. he sat on his bed and opened it slowly revealing his stash of razors. a smile escaped his lips and he began to feel relaxed just at the sight of them. he took one out and examined it moving it between his fingers. he was thinking...should he do it? he closed his eyes and placed the metallic, sharp razor to his arm. he cringed as it sliced into his skin. tears fell down his cheeks. he cut into different section of his skin finding more and more pleasure with each cut. the pain numbed not only his thoughts, but his heart. he was in his own world now. nobody could take this feeling away from him. he found virtue in his temporary high-like state. the blood flowed down his arm. he smiled wide and opened his eyes with a new perspective on the world.

                                              **************************

zayn played with the folded piece of paper in his pocket. he had held on to it tightly not letting it out of his grasp since kaylynn gave it to him. he hadnt even read it and yet he felt as though there was something very important inside.  he fidgeted with the fringe. he spaced out wondering what was written on the sacred piece of paper. he took it out of his suite pocket and stared at it for a moment before opening it. he read it carefully. when zayn finished reading it he wiped his tears and folded back up neatly and returned i to his pocket. how was he suppossed to know when the time to give it to niall was right? he gripped it tightly in his fist and sighed. he looked around his room and stood up. he walked to his closet and opened the safe on the floor. he placed the note inside and sealed it back up.

                                                            ***************************

harry put his hands in his pockets and walked to niall's room. he opened the door to find niall laying on the bed crying. he sat down on the edge and looked to niall. "please niall stop crying..." he begged. niall sat up and hugged harry tightly still sobbing loudly. harry hugged him back. "come on mate please...calm down..." he continued.

niall shook his head still holding him in a tight bro-hug. "i cant i miss her....i love her....this isnt fair.." he cried.

harry patted his back. "i know how you feel niall...i feel the same way..i mean, shes my sister ...but we all have to accept that she is gone now...she lived a long time for a cancer patient..." harry escaped niall's tight hug "she was in so much pain, niall you dont understand, that smile was fake...she sucked it up and tried her best to push it all aside." he continued looking into nialls swollen bloodshot eyes. niall shook his head and wiped his tears with the back of his hand. he sniffled loudly and laid back down on his bed pressing his face into his pillow. harry patted nialls leg and stood up. he went to the closet and pulled down her song binder from the high shelf. he placed it beside niall reaming silent as he walked out and shut the door behind him. 

 

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