Dried Tears

I've always been an outsider, always. Both in social situations, and in family difficulties. Life has always been a challenge for me. Nothing has ever just fallen onto my lap, not a hope, wish or a dream. But I just want someone to talk to when I'm lonely, that someone to hold when I'm cold.


2. Another Day

I woke up with my headphones still in my ears, but no music playing. I glared up at the screen evilly, your the one that always make me get no sleep. I smiled. It took be a few moments for me to process what the time was according to my laptop. My eyes widen. No, no, not today. I threw the draped cover off, pulled out the headphones and legged it to the bathroom. After a moment wasting of unwanted chemicals a.k.a having a piss. I brushed my teeth, swooshed water around my mouth like a bowl, and spat. I briefly washed my neck, face etc. I can't smell or be non-clean, I had an hour and a half long bath last night. I changed into my uniform of a white polo shirt, black trousers and black leather shoes. Normally you're supposed to wear a navy school jumper, but I have reasons for not wearing one. Could I care less?


Instead I pulled on my blue denim jacket, which hugged my skin, leaving me still some room to move. I sorted my make-up out. Applying an ivory coloured foundation, lengthening mascara, pale brown eyeshadow and a thin line of black eye liner. I snapped up my bag, forced it over my shoulders while dashing down the stairs. I peered at the mirror, concluding reluctantly that my long red hair wasn't exceptable, pulled a hairbrush through it. This is when I remembered that I left my iPod and headphones upstairs. I ran up the stairs, still frantically brushing my hair. When I came to my room, I threw the brush on the bed, and tied my hair back in a ponytail, but pulled it to the side of my left cheek. I snatched my headphones and iPod from my laptop, and escaped the house just in time.


I checked the clock on my iPod touch after unlocking it, no-one could ever guess my password. 7:17am. Not bad. I normally leave at 7:15am, and the minute I get there, the bus arrives. So today, my legs were at more of a trot than a walk. My blueish purple Capricorn necklace lightly pounding at my chest. I never take it off, there's no point. I would just clip it on straight away first thing in the morning. And besides, if I did choke to death, well that would be that, fate I guess. I came to a traffic light junction, a road from all four ways. I went to the right, and came to a large car park which was designated for the Co-op which stood in the middle of it. The bus wasn't there, whew. I jogged lightly to the planted tree outside of the delivery entrance. Turned back to the junction, and waited for the bus. Well, it wasn't really a bus, it was a coach, same thing though really.


The bus appeared from the opposite side of the light, and pulled into the car park. Everyone was now predicting where it will stop. About fifteen people get on the bus at this stop, not many if you think about it, but it's the largest stop for this bus. After letting everyone else get on the bus, I prefered not to get caught up in the childish pushing and shoving. Is there any purpose to this? We're all going to get there at the same time you know. They glared at me as if I was gay or something, not excepting me as one of them. Pathetic, actually, I would rather want to die than be one of them. To me, I don't class them as Humans, just things. I sat in my usual seat towards the back of the bus. I popped in my headphones, and burst my music into life. Great, another start, to another boring, life sucking day.

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