Jebus and da Devil: Our life and your times

So imma be Jebus and yous da devil. That just maybe started something. This book is about our funny stories together and how good mates we've become this past year. We hope you guys enjoy our little anecdotes and laugh until you can't breath. Don't stop breathing for too long though, we might have to pay you a visit...

P.S. Also, to those people out there who'll read this and think, "OH MY GOD, HOW DARE THEY?", stop. We're just normal girls with nicknames, they've developed and we even made a background to them, this book is meant to tickle your funny bones not rouse your anger. We're not disrespecting God or religion in any way, we're just sharing our funny stories, is that a crime? Don't hate please, just laugh :)


1. Devil: So this what happened.

Okay, I bet you're all wondering, what normal people would have nicknames like these? Well, no normal people have nicknames like this, sorry. I'm weird, no scratch that, very weird. As for Jebus... I dunno, I'm still trying to make her as weird as me, so far it ain't going so well, but this is a start... Right? O.o

Any who (That's a saying... I think.). It all started a few months ago. I was bored, doodling in English, as usual, and Louise... I mean Jebus was sat in front of me almost asleep. I was in a funny mood and I called her Jesus, to my surprise, she turned around, that was the magic moment her nickname stuck. Why Jebus you ask? Well, she has long brown hair that looks like Jesus' hair. No, I haven't met Jesus, but her hair was just like his I've seen in photo's. I'm weird, but not straight jacket weird, well, at least I think I'm not. 

After a few weeks I felt left out, she had a cool name and I didn't, so because I'm kinda evil, she called me the Devil. I liked the name, who wouldn't? I apparently live in a volcano and when any volcano erupts, the pyroclastic cloud is all the ashes from the people I've tortured to death... I know it's kinda dark, but come on, it's a reasonably awesome thing to imagine? I'm not evil enough to actually kill people. Sometimes though, people annoy me so much I kill them over 10 times in my mind. I've seen so many CSI episodes, I know how to not get caught. Come on, we've all done it.

If you're still reading this and haven't been insulted, I'm proud, you've come this far, may as well finish the journey.

Over to you Jebus Crisp.

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