A Box of Laughter

Just things to brighten up your day and make you laugh. Hopefully . . .

Some material not suitable for younger readers.

Leave some jokes in the comments and I might put them up and give you a mention ;0)

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9. The Worst Things To Say.....

TO YOUR DAUGHTER...

- You're a dirty girl.

- You deserve a spanking for that.

- You're a naughty girl.

- Do what daddy tells you.

 

TO A PERSON YOU FANCY...

- One time I picked my nose and I swear to God I could feel the bottom of my eye!

- Does my hand smell like dog turd to you?

- Have I got any chance of shagging you?

- I had a really weird dream about you. You were covered in cream and chocolate sauce and . . . and . . . Sorry, I got a bit lost in the moment there.

 

IN A JOB INTERVIEW...

- Ok, so let's just be clear, this building is 50 metres away from the nearest park, isnt it?

- Well, I think that a uniform in the workplace is a very good idea. Especially if it's a short skirt and a tight white shirt covered in water. *Singing (It's getting hot in here. So take off all your clothes.)

- Shit, this is chafing! Have you got anything to treat Herpes?

 

IN CONFESSIONS...

- I am truly sorry for raising Satan from hell. If I had to have known that he would have made such a mess, I would never have done it. Oh, the thought of all the blood is making me sick.

- I am also very sorry for throwing up on your lovely carpet.

- Father, I am gay. And I am proud!

- Well, Father, I ... Ah, cold hands! No Sister Agnes, it isn't supposed to bend that way! AAAAARRRGGGHHHH!!!!! I could hear it snapping!

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