Passion '2 (15+)

"Remember when I promised to love you forever?"


"Forever isn't over yet."


84. Things People Say

James' P.O.V: 


"What are you doing here, Jamie?" My mother asked, as she pulled me in for a bone crushing heartwarming hug. One of those that only your mother is able to give you. One of those that really made me want to cry, cause all of sudden all the emotions came at once. Hitting me like a tsunami. But I kept it in. What I had to tell now was a thing I'd never imagined myself saying, specially not to her. She loved Emily, sometimes I believed that she loved like she would have loved her own daughter, if she had had one.

She finally pulled away, and took a step back, letting her eyes wander over me. From my toes and to the tip of my head. "You sure look like your father," She chuckled, and reached a hand out to take my suitcase. She always told me how much I reminded her of my father, a man who died from cancer a few years after my my birth. I didn't have any memory of him, but I had pictures. A lot of them. Not that it was something that bothered me anymore, 27 without a dad wasn't really that hard. I mean... I was after all grown up, the only person I always had been worried about, was my mother. The little chubby lady with the dark brown hair, that now stood in front of me in her Sunday clothes. The fine ones. The ones that she had worn to church. 
She locked her fingers around the handle, and grabbed my suitcase. Then she lead me into the little living room where the walls were filled with pictures, mostly of family and friends. 

The ones over the fireplace were the ones that meant the most to her. There was one from a few weeks after I was born, of my dad, my mom and me. Then my granddad and grandmother, that had died when I was fourteen and sixteen. Then a picture of her two dogs. Molly and Spencer, who were two Cocker Spaniel's. 

They both welcomed me with swinging tails, and tongues hanging from their open mouthes. They were old, but still filled with life. 

"So Jamie, what brings you here? Is Emily with you? Is she carrying the rest of your stuff - oh Jamie! You can't let her do that all alone, do and he-"

"- Mum, she's not here." I cut her off, and kept on watching all of the pictures carefully. I didn't want to look my mom in the eyes at that moment. I didn't even want to break the news to her. She would be shattered. 



I had a hard time trying to pull myself together, and being alone in a bed made for two didn't make it any easier. My new flat was nice, but would never replace the place that Emily and I had had. I regretted letting her go, cause after all she was...
The woman that I loved with whole my heart. The woman that barely even was a woman. A girl that maybe had rushed her life a little too much, though I didn't want to think that. I just wanted to go back and stop myself from leaving. I wanted to stop her from meeting that old boyfriend, Zayn or what he was called, the night when she had left to go to London. I wanted to be there to stop her from falling in love with him. 

No, actually I wanted to...

I wanted to stop Zayn before he decided to ruin everything that Emily and I had build up the past years. I wanted to kick him out of our lives. I wanted him long gone. I wished that I had seen the signs, and that I could've told the bastard to stay away from the girl that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. But he was selfish, and he knew where he had her. 

He played on her. He wanted her, probably because she was taken. Engaged. 

And my Emily, she was a big hearted girl, and that I let it happen was my fault. I should've known better. From the moment she mentioned him, I should've know. Fought harder. Taken her back when she apologised. Maybe it was too late, but as I paced back and forth in my living room trying to convince myself that it was too late, and that it was over, a little voice kept on saying: 

Better late than never.


This ain't how it was supposed to be. 

If you're out chasing all your dreams, tell me where does that leave me?

What about the plans that you left behind?

The beautiful red house by the railway line. 

The one we picked out, and even put the payment down. 

What about the promise that you made, to stay with me till your dying days. 

Said you'd never go away. 

But that's just things people say. 

It was so hard to show my face around in the beginning,

I guess they had heard the news.

About me and you. 

It's 3 a.m. and I still can't sleep, cause I wonder where you are tonight,

and do I ever cross your mind? 

My mother wouldn't stop crying, she wondered what went wrong.

Could I have loved a little deeper, or did I hold on too strong? 


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