Will a holiday in South America solve all their problems?






Clive’s two passions in life were sex and food.


His particular obsession within each of these categories were the exploration of what is commonly known as BDSM in one, and meat, particularly the cooking of steak, in the other.


Although armchair psychologists might find it interesting to explore hidden, overt or subliminal links between, say, a T-bone and what might be considered by some as somewhat unusual sexual activities, that is of no consequence and it is not where this narritive is going.


Fortuitously for Clive, and for Jessica, probably, his metabolism had thus far protected him from the problems sometimes associated with eating. And luckily for Clive, Jessica was not put off by what some would consider a bizarre interest in the particualar sexual activities he was intent on exploring. On the contrary, she seemed to find them stimulating, interesting and enlightening.


On the downside, and there’s usually a downside, Ciive was not particularly career-driven, his promotional prospects were poor, and he had no wealthy relatives and not a penny to scratch his arse with. So, short of marrying, winning or stealing money, his life was destined to be middle-class-mundane. And his future would always be on a rung at the lower end of the accounts department ladder. He did have some responsibility for handling fairly large amounts of money, but he never took decisions, and everything he did was always scrutinized by others.


But Jessica did notice one thing: although he’d held the same position for years, despite his pedestrian job, and his apparently mundane background, he always seemed to have the wherewithal to indulge the two obsessions that interested him. Clubs and restaurants were constantly on the agenda. And he was never short of a new sex toy or gadget he’d found on the internet.


Let’s take time out here, several paragraphs into Jessica’s story, to take stock of where we’re at. From what’s gone before, it’s obvious that sex plays an important role in her life. And it’s a moot point whether what she and her lover are about to indulge in is normal or not.


Although some hold the point of view that these particular sexual adventures are outside of the norm, others believe that we have simply been misled by those who, for whatever reason, would prefer sex to be quick, mundane, unadventurous and exclusively for procreational purposes. The missionary position (face to face, lights out, curtains closed, minimal removal of garments, etc, etc) did not become a jocular metaphor because of the unpopularity of the modus operandi. Just the opposite. At one time, most couples knew no other positions, experimentation and discussion were rare, and they almost always did nothing else.


However, thanks probably to blue movies, dirty books and information from the internet, attitudes, ideas and practices have changed. Although there is a fine line, and not every whim or predilection or new idea can be condoned, many practices remain off limits, and are probably illegal, even as far as libertine ideas are concerned. But the point of this long and fast-becoming boring paragraph is to warn that some of what happens here could offend. It’s up to you whether you read on or not. But if you’re a wowser please don’t go past this full stop.


Now that you’ve had your second warning, let’s go back to Jessica’s lover.


Clive also had the attribute to be able to tell sexually stimulating anecdotes.


‘I find it really interesting that so many people are so inhibited by their backgrounds,’ he told Jessica one day. ‘Their narrow mindedness. And their unadventurous attitudes. To sex, I mean. You know I told you about that holiday I had a few months ago, just before we got together. Well, I met this couple.  James and Sonja, I think their names were, but it doesn’t’ matter. It was great. We had such good fun. And now it’s over. We’ll probably never see each other again. No harm done. Everyone enjoyed what we did. No one was coerced into doing anything they didn’t want to do. A great time was had by all, and now we’re back to our separate routines. And we’ve taken up our own lives again.’



Despite his peculiarities, and predilections, and he had many, Clive had also recently discovered that there was another dimension to sex, one that had eluded him for many years. Prior to this revelation, he had been intent on his own pleasure. He did what interested him. Things that he found stimulating, and he made sure hat his partner did what she, and if truth be told, on one or two rare occasions, what he, his partner, that is, was encouraged to do to enhance Clive’s stimulation and enjoyment. He found now that he got a large dollop of gratification out of giving sexual pleasure to others.




One of his favourite subjects in a repertoire of many concerning his love affair with food, Clive was prepared to speak for hours on beef and the preparation thereof. Jessica remembered the first time he described his passion for garlic steak. Succulent. Spicy. Pungent. Juicy. Rare. ‘It’s almost a love affair,’ she though. ‘As if he’s describing a sexual contact in detail.’


‘And my life’s ambition,’ he added, ‘is to have a few steak meals in South America. Grass-fed beef is the best in the world, and I intend to get down there one day.’

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