Pineal Discharge

Short stories. Unrelated scenes of violence and bizarre vignettes.
Some(most) of these stories contain graphic violence,sexual content and drug use. Also , lots of fucking language and shit. So yeah , viewer discretion is advised? Not for children. Unless you're one of THOSE children.
Yeah , you know who you are.


Wait...what?

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29. Revenge of the Praying Mantis

So, picture this.

 

The doorbell rings. An irritating chorus of tiny bells. THE BRIDE answers her door.

"Hello?"

"It's Bob."

"Oh! Come on in!"

THE BRIDE unlatches the door. Bob pushes his way inside, pushes past her. He sits down in a large beanbag chair. THE BRIDE 'prances' over to him and tries to sit on his lap. He responds by roughly shoving her aside. Feeling hurt(aka aroused) THE BRIDE gives Bob a kind of masochistic "come hither" look.

Bob, in no mood to play games, bolts upright and storms into the kitchen. THE BRIDE follows. He gets a few feet into the kitchen and stops. The Blob Lady. That fucking Blob Lady. She's standing there holding the severed penis like a cigarette, pretending to smoke it. THE BRIDE doesn't stop. In an attempt to get a response out of Bob, she decides to start smacking him. Bob, feeling perplexed and pissed off, ignores the slaps and starts cussing out the female shaped gelatin.

"What the fuck? I mean really, what the FUCK?! Who are you?! What do you even WANT from me?! I've got no bone to pick with you!!

The Blob Lady squirms and wriggles around in a sort of gleeful teasing. This just pisses Bob off more. THE BRIDE, still slapping, asks, "Who are you talking to?" Then she lands a flat palm on his cheek. This gets Bob's attention. He whirls around and backhands with so much force, she stumbles backwards. "That's more like it." she says. "Give it all you've got! Come on!"

Bob is now furious. He's just had enough. The Blob Lady stealing the penis, THE BRIDE always wanting to play these sadomasochistic sex games. He pulls a .38 revolver out of his pants pocket and shoots THE BRIDE in the knee cap.

An explosion of flesh and bone explodes from her leg as THE BRIDE falls to the floor, crippled. Bob stands over her glaring a death glare that would burn a hole in lead.

She looks at her ruined knee, wincing in delight. "Oh my God...This is..." her voice trails off as she starts orgasming. Sick of her crazy fetish, Bob takes the scalpel and cuts open THE BRIDE's shirt. Her erect nipples like little misplaced tent stakes.

Scalpels are very sharp.

Bob slices off both of THE BRIDE's nipples. Her bodily twists and spasms making the cuts uneven and jagged. Blood stains THE BRIDE, her clothes, Bob's hands and the floor.

Bob rises from his kneeling position and leaves THE BRIDE to bleed. He walks to the kitchen sink and starts washing his hands. Red water fills the dirty dishes. On the counter next to the sink, THE GROOM's penis. Bob's eyes go wide and he looks beyond the pages of his perception...wait no that's stupid. All he does is , he turns around to see THE BRIDE levitating towards him. She's all screaming and shit. Spitting fire-y vengeance towards Bob. He grabs the penis and throws it at her. It bounces off of her harmlessly. When she's right in front of his face she smiles a smile full of sharp, barracuda teeth. Her jaws wrap around Bob's head and neck. A thick crunching, like an earthquake inside of a glass bottle. Bob's headless corpse falls lifeless to the floor.

Two police officers burst into the house. THE BRIDE, still levitating descends to their level. The officers scream in terror and open fire. THE BRIDE dies.

The two police men inspect the scene with grave curiosity. The horrific colours and shit. That Blob Lady's still the house though. She starts swallowing the first officer, while the second officer unloads the rest of his clip into the goo. This does nothing, of course, because The Blob Lady is a blob of humanoid gelatin.

This story is over. It made no sense. It also had no point or message. If you don't like that, well, I really don't give a damn.

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