Not again.

Abigal is in love, yes in love. Keir is her life, her whole meaning to life until he leaves. Abigal is broken and alone, no-one understands her not even her own sister. Abi is frustrated and needs to find someone who understands. Introducing Michael, a boy only Abi knows. She thinks she loves him but Keir is always on her mind. Day and night!
Two years later, Abi has left school and is starting a new life with Michael at college pushing away her old life, her old friends, Keir. Forgetting someone isn't that simple when Keir walks into her form room two months in. Abi's feelings for Keir rush back and she falls in love again... Michael tries to protect her from Keir and her past knowing it will break her once again. Abi loves Michael but she isn't in love. Everything happens for a reason but what if you can't forget.


3. Before Band night.

By three o'clock we had watched two films and starting another one, when I couldn't bare to watch anymore american girls run around the screen complaining that one boy didn't love them. It was dull. Stereotypical drizzle. "Shouldn't you get ready for tonight?" I questioned to a now drowsy Keir laying against the sofa with me in his arms. He groaned slightly as he woke himself up fully, "I guess so but I don't want to leave you!" Keir said but he still got the hint and turned the TV off. Silence fell, but it was a silence that brought happiness not fear and worry, I sighed peacefully sinking further into his warm, open arms. "I love you," I whispered entwining my fingers into his, wanting to be so close there was no space between us at all. "I love you too beautiful, I know I should get ready but I want to be with you every minute I can!" He explained pulling me close to his body enriching my nostrils with the mascaline smell of the same aftershave I gave him for his previous birthday. I smiled at the memories of that day, but Keir was being more clingy than usual... I coudln't complain I loved being with him but something was wrong I could sense it. I tried to push the feeling aside and focus on the band night, "what are you playing tonight?" I asked politely even though I could guess straight away, the boys liked to play their old, favourite songs over and over again because they are scared to experiment as they may lose their selected fans! "I think we will do the general obviously and I wrote a solo song for me to sing and play to as well." Keir answered and I smiled at the fact that they were so predictable.

"What's your new song?" I questioned thinking that I had heard it or it hadn't even been mentioned to me. I guess I was kind of their band manager I booked the gigs and made sure they didn't fall out or do something stupid! I enjoyed it, I loved the vibe that the band needed me if they were to get anywhere as they were so lazy getting up at two in the afternoon if I was lucky. They thought I would run after them and I do all the time for Keir because I know he is very passionate about music and wanting it to be his future career. "Well, you'll have to wait and see like all the fans, don't worry I have rehearsed properly and know word for word." Keir responded grinning and kissing my cheek.

"You better, you don't want to embarass yourself on stage like Nat did when he tried to do some heroic guitar solo making him forget the whole tune." I smiled at the thought of what an idiot Nat looked like. Nat one of Keir's band mates and his best friend since they met in reception both agreeing to become famous together. I sometimes felt jealous of Nat when they were on stage together and all the fangirls going on about a bromance between them, I know it sounds stupid and yeah everyone critises me about it. Keir is mine though. "I promise I won't beautiful, I know the song and the tune. I really hope you like it!" He explained reassuring me of any worries that I had about the gig. I knew he was telling the truth and he would nail it like he did at every gig they performed. "Okay, you need to get ready or the band will complain if you're late AGAIN!" I announced knowing that the boys didn't like Keir ditching them to spend time with me when they need to reassure or write new songs.

"Fine, I bought the clothes for tonight in my rucksack so we could be together until the last minute before I'm on stage!" Keir stated making me realise his blue tattered bag on the right of the front door.

"Well, you better go change quickly, so we can get off towards the venue!" I replied realising it was nearly four o'clock and wondered how the hour went so fast.

"It's only four o'clock babe." Keir shouted as he grabbbed his rucksack off the floor and ran up my stairs heading towards teh bathroom. A few seconds later, I heard the bathroom door lock behind him and went through to the kitchen to grab a cup of now cold coffee. I glupped it down realising I was really thirsty as I had nothing to drink all day, I placed the mug by the sink next to teh now growing pile of washin up that I knew I would have to do soon or dad would bark at me for not doing my share of the chores again. I sighed feeling drained after a lazy afternoon, I needed to wake myself up for the gig... falling asleep at your boyfriend's gig is not the way to impress people or get the right thought of the band into people's mind. I heard Keir running down the stairs as I poured myself another cup of coffee, I placed the mug down as I felt Keir grab me from behind. I squealed like a little girl, "I could have split that!" I announced.

"Good thing you didn't then aye!" Keir teased winking at me and spinning me round. I smiled, this is one of the times I want to freeze and never leave.

"Lucky!" I winked and kissed his neck, we had these hints that would tell one another to kiss us. It sounds stupid yeah but it showed he wanted to kiss me and loved me in my mind, I guess. You see, even after a year I still couldn't fully believe Keir was mine... he could have any girl who was much prettier than me any day of the week with a click of his fingers. He used to fancy my best friend before we got together but she was bad news, I fell in love with him so soon and he said he did the same. I'm insecure though, I believe him with all my heart but I can't push the thought out of my mind that when he finds a better girl he'll drop me instantly. "We better get to the venue to set a good role model on the lads, aye?" Keir suggested bringing me out of my thoughts and into to the realisation of Keir being my boyfriend... I have to support him... I love him. No doubts. "Okay sweetie, us a good role model? You joking?" I joked and winked at him, kissing his neck pulling him towards the front door. I grabbed my keys and Keir's hoodie he gave me off the side, opening the front door with the cold air whipping my hair around my shoulders. Keir pulled me into him, his warmth radiating my body keeping out the cold. I pulled myself into the hoodie zipping it up  quickly. Keir intwined his fingers in mine, smiling as I snuggled into his hoodie, I smiled back hoping I was wrong about any doubts I had whether I was good enough for him or not. We walked about twenty minutes towards Jay's house, Jay was the drummer of the band dating Jasmine who was a year older - they had been together for four months and they were in their honeymoon stage. Keir knocked on the door pulling me closer to him, not wanting any space between us. I heard footsteps from the other side and the lock turning as the door was pulled open, we were welcomed by Charlie, a pitbull similar to Keir's one, Alfie, but Charlie was an old dog with a puppy's heart and personality. Charlie jumped up licking my hands and face as I leaned down to stroke him pulling Keir down with me. I made a fuss of him and stepped inside needing to warm up. "Alright mate," Keir said shaking Jay's hand and bringing him in for a manly hug. "Alright." Jay replied, smiling at me and giving me a hug then gesturing for us to go into his living room. Jasmine sat on a brown leather sofa next to Matt and his girlfriend Lizzie, they all smiled as Chris jumped up of a beanie bag on the floor and ran open armed at Keir and I bringing us in for a big bear hug. "I've missed you guys," Chris squeezed us tight, making me having to catch my breath once he let go. "We only saw you yesterday at band rehearsals Chris!" I said as Keir fake punched him in the arm. Chris was such a silly idiot, he loved having everyone together, we were like a family and he was the youngster kid. "But still..." He complained slightly as I gave him another hug.

"Where's Louis?" Keir asked sitting down on the single leather recliner pulling me with him. I snuggled in to him, smiling I loved being with the whole band.

"Right here!" I heard Lou call from upstairs then followed heavy footsteps running down the stairs. The living room door flung open to see Lou standing there in a over-sized mickey mouse jumper grinning like an idiot. He grabbed me off Keir and spun me round making me giggle like a little kid. "Put me down or I will not be to blame for your injuries!" I squealed, as he put me down everyone rolled their eyes and Keir jumped into his now waiting arms. Lou was like a brother to me, being the oldest one of the group. I knew him since we were in diapers, he knew me like the back of his hand and the same with him to me. He is the reason I fell in love with Keir, after Lou moved to Southend in year four and meeting the whole band, the same summer my family followed allowing me to reunite with my brother and meet the band (well they weren't a band back then obviously). I always went to him for my problems he always had answers, Lou has been through so much after being abused by his dad from a young age making his mum move to Southend where she killed herself, meaning Lou moved in with us until his sister Gabriella came back from America from university. They were all fine but I could tell they missed their mum with their house still decorated in pictures of her, it felt as though I lost my mum as well because my real mum died at child birth leaving my dad to look after me with my pop and nan breathing down his back. No-one would ever guess our past because we didn't talk about it only to each other. Keir knew everything of course and so did all the band eventually.  They took it well being supportive throughout but they never really understood. I think that's what drew Lou to music and singing it was his scapegoat after I prevented him from self-harming causing him to go to hospital regularly for six months. You'd never guess if you saw him now, no way. "How you been, missus?" Lou asked breaking me from deep thoughts.

"Fine thanks, yourself?" I replied realising I hadn't spoken to him properly after he got with Georgia and then broke up with her after Georgia threatened me to stay away from him. That put strain on mine and Keir's relationship as well, it was all over now we were a three wheeled bike at times, going through everything together... through thick and thin. "I'm good thanks, missed you!" Lou said pulling me into another hug.

"Oh, I see how it is!" I heard Keir say behind me, I turned round to see him sulking.

"Keir, I missed you more. I love you bro!" Lou announced jumping on top of him, their bromance made me so happy. It was ridiculious, I just joked around with it and so did the other boys of the band. I knew the banter was about to start.

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