How could your best friend in the whole wide world, also be the love of your life? How could they be the person that makes your heart stop beating for a second every time they look into your eyes?

"All our young lives we search for someone to love, someone who makes us complete. We choose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope, all the while wondering if somewhere and somehow there is someone searching for us." -The Wonder Years


11. Comfort

"Friendship is one mind in two bodies"
- Mencius

I tried to continue looking at him but i couldn't do that either. I tried to speak too but my mouth was so dry. I sensed him looking at my body, which was shivering and naked. I felt humilated.

"See, i told you you'd enjoy it" Ricky said, far too close to my ear. "You know, i think i deserve something in return for that." Thats when i managed to look at him and he winked at me. Could he not see i was crying? But knowing he could try something again with me any minute gave me enough energy to get up. I went around his room trying to dress myself as quick as i could, whilst Ricky just watched me.

"Babe?" I didn't answer him. I didn't want too. I hurried out his room and down his stairs still buttoning my shirt up and Ricky followed me. "Where are you going?" I ran out his front door into the pouring rain. "At least wait till the rain passes Mace!" He shouted at me. I didn't even look at him.

I didnt know where to go. I didn't want to go home. I wanted to go to Josh's but i couldn't go to his looking like this. I was absolutely drenched, still half crying and with all my make up running. There was only one person i could think of in that moment. 




"Maci?" Shaun opened the door suprised to see me.

"I'm sorry, i didn't know where else to go" I whimpered.

"Come in you daft sod" he hurried me inside and wrapped his arms around me. "Get you dry and warm and you tell me everything, okay?" I nodded.

Shaun gave me a shirt of his to get changed into, so i went and changed in his bathroom. Whilst i was getting undressed i couldn't help but catch myself in the mirror. I stood their staring at my body. All i could see was Ricky. The way his pierecing eyes stared at me. Or the way his hands ran all over my body. Or the feel of his lips all over it too. I felt disgusting. I quickly put on Shauns shirt and went to see him.

"Here" he handed me a coffee and i tried to smile. "So then?"

As soon as he said them words i burst into tears and he comforted me. I told everything to Shaun about what happened. He just sat their, listening. When I'd finished he just looked at the floor and shook his head.

"It's all my fault" I whispered.

"No it is not, don't you ever think that Mace. He is a disgusting pig and he should not have done that to you, no matter how long you've been going out for." I just burried my head in Shaun's chest and cried.

I jumped when Shauns phone started ringing. He answered it and was talking to Josh. I could hear faintly Josh's voice and it made me feel a lot better.

"Erm, well I've got Maci over at the moment" Shaun said, i started to panic. I so wanted Josh to be here but not when i was constantly crying. "Oh right, okay then mate, cya soon" and he hung up. "Yeah, Josh will be here in 10." I shot out of Shaun's arms to try and wipe as much mascara and eyeliner from my face as possible. God i looked a state. "What you doing?" Shaun asked.

"He can't see me like this."

"Why? Are you not going to tell him?" I sighed and shook my head. "Mace, you need to tell him! Its Josh!"

"I know but i don't want him to know. He said the other day to promise him to not do anything I'm not comfortable with, and i've broken that so i don't want to let him down." I sighed.

"Mace he won't care about that, he cares about you so much, he will want to know." I guess Shaun was right, but i shook my head as we heard a knock at the door. 

"No, keep it between us. Do i look like i've been crying?" Shaun sighed and said no and went to let Josh in.




"Hiya gorgeous" Josh walked in Shauns room and smiled at me. I tried to act normal but it was so hard. I managed a little smile and said hey. He looked me up and down with a confused look whilst flinging himself in a beanbag. Shaun walked in and smiled friendly at me.

"Why you here Mace? And why you only wearing a shirt?" He raised his eyebrows. Shaun answered for me.

"She just came over but got wet on the way from the bus stop so i gave her that" and i smiled. Josh just shrugged his shoulders.

"Yeah look, i brought Die Hard box set, you like Die Hard, right Mace?" I just nodded my head. "Okay what's up with you?" He did that look that always makes me feel like i should tell him everything.

"Nothing" i paused. "Shall we put them on then?" I said, cheerful but Josh just looked at me suspisciously.

"You will tell me." He said whilst putting the DVD on.

As we all sat cuddled up watching Die Hards i kept notcing Josh peering at me every now and then, with a worried look on his face. I tried my best to reassure him with smiles but i knew he wasn't buying it.

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