What do I have to do to make you proud?


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It is hard to understand, What this life is meant to hold, Are we meant to follow the crowd like lost sheep? Or are we meant to stand up and be bold. By staying on that path, It is hard to say that you'll know what this life is about, You'd be following rules rather than learning from mistakes, Not understanding the stress and hard work given - on finding your way 'out' Being bold and strong however has it's flaws, Where do you go if it all fails? What happens after that, Once you have fallen off the rails. It is hard to decipher what you should do, Which choice to make,  What one would be right and wrong, For however long it will take. I turned to you for guidence, For you to tell me what i should do, My reply 'Be all you want to be, and be yourself', So for now - i intend to. Then the months and years go past,  And still i follow your kind words, Till I across the path of being told, Making my mind reel backwards. After so long of being 'Myself' and different, Only now have I been told not to be, So what does this mean? I'm not allowed to be me? I always thought you'd be proud, Of knowing someone who wasn't afraid of showing their identity, Who was not frightened in being different, Giving their mind serenity. I don't understand, You change your words without a second thought,  Is different good or bad? Was it a waste of my time for all the things i fought- To make you proud of me?

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