Alter Ego

Lola Drake is just a normal girl at home in England... well I suppose you could call her just a tad crazy as well...

Let's start again.This is the story of a crazy girl called Lola. Her initial reaction to the news she is a Princess in Russia is 'What The Frick?!' At first she doesn't even believe it, considering to go on a 'becoming normal' course, if that even exists. She's managed to annoy her friend with her craziness, after meditating in the street and shooing off her boyfriend...

Give it a go, it's funny, well that sounds big headed... oh just read please:-)

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3. Russian Blood?

Well, oh my god.

Oh my god.

OH. MY. GOD.

I am a quarter Russian. And I am officially a princess.

Dad just walked in the room and sat me down, for a 'talk.' I always dread these talks, because they're always on some cringey subject like s-e-x, (what? I'm too British...) or something heart achingly boring like ensuring that I get an A in every single subject. Yawn. Yada Yada Yada.

So the easiest way to explain it is by doing it like a script in Drama. Just because I'm overly professional and cool like that. Cue the...Shakespearian play. Oh you know what, just read it, 'kay?

Dad: Lola, come and sit down here next to me. What I tell you will affect your immediate future, and it is possible that you may suffer from a very big shock, perhaps resulting in hospitalisation. So I bought your inhaler.

Me: Dad, you know what, you make me feel so much better about things-

Dad: I know. Now please keep calm. In fact, I should hope you take this news brilliantly and jump for joy. Because if I was in your shoes right now, I would be very happy. Very shocked, but happy. So anyway, that letter about you being a princess...

Me: Dad, I already know. I have already wiped away my tears at the great sadness I have suffered; the fact I shall not be a princess is just so sad. It's such a shame that I won't have to move to Russia in the freezing cold hypo thermal temperatures and dying. Sad.

Dad: Oh well, you are.

Me: Dad, why so funny?

So what happened next is that he revealed I am a Russian princess and next week I will be there for a month of Royal visit with Queen Ariana and King John. 

Going to sleep on it...

***

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