How to Save Your Life

Natasha is suffering. She is struggling to believe that her life is worth anything more than the bruises upon her face and is trying to juggle herself between her painful school life and her lonely home life.

Whilst the bullies think that they are clever for what they do, they fail to empathise with the hurting Natasha. And, considering they are knowledgable towards her situation, they persist to break down her life and soul.

Can she defeat the two groups that both appear to want her to fail; can she reach her dreams through the power of love and loss; and can she break the strong hold that is constantly held around her?


3. The Hardest Day Ever

Natasha focused her entire energy on ignoring the bullies and forcing her way through to the end of her school years. She made sure that she did not show any sign of weakness and attempted to keep a strong expression when the stabbing comments where thrust upon her. However, the more she mourned and was made to hear about her mother’s death, the harder it became to act her feelings. Soon enough, her false emotions were transparent, and everyone around her could read the rawness that evolved from her hurt and suffering. They then began to physically harm her as well as verbally degrading her confidence.

But it wasn’t until after one surprisingly quiet day that the real assault commenced. Natasha had spent the whole weekend stressing about the commencing time at school. Her dreary experiences creating a depressing atmosphere, even outside of the bullies’ shifts, meant that she could no longer enjoy the freedom that the two days used to present to her. No matter how relentlessly she tried, her thoughts couldn't channel themselves away from the hurtful comments; and there was only so much she could do to avoid the petite, but roundly-shaped, bruises that were a sign of constant harassment. All in all, she found it very challenging to prevent herself from breaking down after every delicate movement she created.

That following Monday morning, Natasha begged her father to not force her back to the unsafe haven that was contaminated with malicious vermin. Nothing that she did seemed to loosen his hold on abandonment; nothing more was worth the risk, or effort. So she reluctantly and fearfully made her way to school- something she would definitely regret in the near future.

However, when she arrived, she was greeted by the beaming faces of the hopeful lower years. The naivety and belief written all over their young, inexperienced expressions as they held open the main door for the terrified wreck that Natasha had become. None of them, she knew. But, the one thing she did know was that their kindness and care towards others (especially those of higher years), would put them in the same disturbing situation that she was now in. It was, unfortunately, the strange ways of social interaction that loomed over their place of education. It was a real shame that they would soon figure that out and retract the innocence that they gave away that morning.

Although, that one drop of sunlight, the hope and the pleasantness behind their smiles, may have been the positive reaction towards her day. She expected more harsh comments, an increase to the level of hurt they had already thrust upon her and a decrease of tolerance on Natasha’s part. But the time that ticked by after proved her thoughts and expectations wrong. There wasn’t anyone waiting for her after every lesson, or anyone hiding around the many corners of the long corridors. No one jumped out in front of her to wail abuse and jab her chest with strong and deadly blows. Nothing. Her day was the most peaceful experience that she had witnessed for a very consuming period of time. For once in her life, she managed to walk out of her final lesson, and head back towards home, with a very broad and relieved smile upon her exhausted features. Finally, her perseverance towards safety and happiness had succeeded in creating boredom within the bullies. And once again, her thoughts were soon proved incorrect.

It was as though they monitored her every feeling, her every move towards the beginning of that week. They built her up to believe that it was all over, her time of pain completed. And, when they let her walk out that door with the grateful expression she had, they revealed their mocking actions for Natasha to see. All of the bullies huddled together in a tight group, so as to appear less than they actually were. Following their victim, they shuffled down the street, already laughing at their plan before it had even been tested or undergone. If it wasn’t for the fact that Natasha was, for once, not looking out for the trouble that could be detected, she would have already broke into a desperate run. But she didn't know that they were their- her lack of paranoia to blame- and she wasn’t to find out until the time was right for them all; all of them except Natasha.

She had proceeded all the way to the end of two streets before they commenced with the attack. Two of the bullies broke away from the pack they had formed, and grabbed Natasha’s arms with an intense force that whipped her back five steps. She was instantly five steps closer to hell. All sense of direction had vanished as the frightened girl was pushed in all directions with forceful shoves that overwhelmed her mind and body. Every time one of them attempted to contribute to the attack, they would scream abuse towards their prey; swearing at her and threatening her already empty life.

Before long, the physical phase towards the strike was greatly increased and strengthened. They ceased in pushing her between the ever growing gang that had formed, and alternated this to sharp, stinging beating. A large, towering fraction of the bullies was silently elected to restrain the helpless Natasha, who had no hope of breaking free from the grip that was locked by the well-built muscles. For everyone else, they were free to hit; using her as a boxer would treat a punching bag. The first blow was directed towards her stomach, which retracted from the brutality as she was winded by the punch. After that beginning, there was no stopping the aim that the evil group had drilled into their thoughts. One punch after another, no time for her to stop for breath or recover for retaliation; the only thing she was able to perform, was to stand and take everything that was aggressively thrown at her. And, as they moved towards the young girl’s face and chest, she closed her eyes and ran her mind over one phrase: “this is it mum, I’m coming soon, I won’t be long, I promise.”

Everything appeared to happen so fast, meaning the pain didn't set until they had ended their brutality and walked away. They laughed and cheered as they went back around the corner, using Natasha’s situation as a triumphant view of pride and success; as if it was something to celebrate. And, whilst they were celebrating, she was left at the corner of the pavement to bleed and cry. Dreaming that her sins would just disappear with the blood flow, she imagined a life where no one would notice her. She was exhausted of feeling like worthless vermin; she knew, deep down, that she wasn’t- but why didn't people reciprocate this understanding? For years now, she cast the same prayer to the skies above. And for years now, her cries for help had been ignored. There was only one thing left that she could do to make people notice. There was only one thing she could do to end it all: the bullying, the pain, the misery.

So Natasha lifted her dead-weighted body with her failing limbs that allowed a shaky recovery to her feet. With various stumbles invading her walk, she made her way home as fast as she could. Not only to get away from the dark, gloomy atmosphere that had now attacked the night, but to also begin her plan to end it all.

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