Eve's Diary

(This is NOT my diary, even though it seems quite realistic I suppose:) )
Eve is religious, different and her own person. That's why she keeps her diary.
A new diary entry for each day:-)

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5. It's Raining from the Sky & It's Raining from my Eyes

Dear Diary,

It's raining its pouring the old man is snoring... literally. My Granddad's here, but he's asleep. He's just been diagnosed with Alzheimers. He can't remember me. 

All those times we've had; gone. I asked him 'Hi Granddad, you okay?" and he just looked at me with dead eyes, and a confused look on his face. 

I lost it. I collapsed on the floor sobbing. My Grandma's had both died, and now my Granddad was basically dead. He was gone.

"Who are you all?" My Granddad asked, his eyes going wild. "Who's she?" He pointed at me, and my heart went dull with pain. I held his hands and smiled confidently. "I'm Eve. Your Granddaughter. You're my Granddad, remember? Don't you remember? Screwing my belly button and my bottom will fall off?" My Grandad always made me laugh. He'd hug me tightly so my ears went deaf whenever he saw me.

And now he was just a stranger.

Only a miracle could help him now.

"Grandad?"

"I'm not a granddad dear."

He stood up. "I must be in the wrong place. Lovely daughter you two have."

My Dad's eyes were going red. "Dad...you must remember me? Your my DAD." He suddenly looked so small, and he reminded me of how he looked when Nan died. He just crumpled into Mum, sobbing. "Dad, please, stay. You remember me, you know you do. Remember your wife?" He pulled out a photo of her and Granddad on their wedding day. "See, your my Dad."

"I'm not. I just don't know who you are! I'm sorry. This place is crazy."

I was scared. Nobody could help me. Mum and Dad were collapsing, and Granddad was gone. Bam. He didn't know anything.

"Granddad. You have a disease okay? It's called Alzheimers. You've forgotten who we are. But we are your family, okay?"

"I may as well die." he said quietly.

"What?"

"I can't live like this. Not knowing. Kill me? Now."

"Granddad..."

"I'M NOT YOUR GRANDAD!" he shouted and I retreated. "I don't know what you're on about!"

It's too hard, and I can't cope. I think I want to leave this world now. No, Eve, what are you on about? The world is beautiful.

But today I can't believe that. How is everyone carrying on with life, while I'm here with my ill Granddad and my parents who can't cope? It's impossible to believe that everyone's carrying on as normal, while I'm so sad. Is that selfish?

He hobbled towards the door. 

I ran after him and hugged him tightly, just the way he used to hug me. I squeezed him tightly and didn't let go. 

"Please don't leave me Granddad. Please. I need you." Tears ran down my face, as I desperately clung onto him. "No no! Don't go please! I love you, I love you and I need you so much. Nanny said she needs you to look after me. And you're just going to leave."

I closed my eyes and let the tears run. "Please don't forget me." I whispered.

I'm sure I saw a little bit of recognition in his eyes. He sunk down, cursing at his bad back. This was the Granddad I knew, but I knew he still wasn't back. I felt like a baby. I sat down onto his  lap, my tears seeping into his shirt, his familiar smell warming me. I told him again, in case he'd forgotten. "Don't forget us." 

 

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