Confessions of a Housecarl

Behind every powerful Dragonborn there is a Housecarl standing in the door frame..


1. By Talos Beard




I was sat in the Bannered Mare, by the fire drinking some good cold mead. Listening to Mikael the bard drop a few tunes, he is always claiming that his gonna make it big this year. I know Mikael is taking part in "Whiterun got Talent " during Rain's Hand, but I doubt he will make it far. As we discussed this the main door creaked open and a strong female figure walked in. She was  about 5ft 5 , muddy fur boots,  greasy studded armour and upon her head. The helmet of the Dragonborn. Of all the Inns in all of Skyrim, she had to walk into mine.


Hulda brought out the finest goblet, none of the wooden crap she usually served us. Than Mikael piped up

" What can I sing for you my fair maiden." Straight up creep.

Hulda not only brought the good goblets out,but also produced a case of  Black-Briar Mead. 25 Septims a bottle. That's like a weeks wages right there!. 

The Dragonborn took a good swig. Banged down the fine goblet. Nodded to Hulda and walked out. What a Ledge. 





Today will go down in history as the best day ever! Not only did I get a grand tour of Dragonreach but I only got to hang out with Balgruuf the Greater.

Granted I was woken up 5am in the morning by the Jarl's men. Stripped washed and forced to iron my hide armour. Its not every day you meet the Jarl of Whiterun.

Walking through  the Plain district  was eerie that early in the morning. No shouting of -

" One Septim. One Septim. Get your potato. One Septim."

The same could be said as I walked up into  the Wind district .No random shouts about Talos from that nut job Heimskr. If there ever was an award for creepy priest he would win hands down.

Gildergreen stood in silence forever watchful.  I had my first kiss by that tree, ahh Ysolda how I miss your lips. At last  I reached the Cloud district  my  final destination and home to Dragonreach. They say King Olaf one-eye  himself . Subdued  and kept a Dragon there, showoff.


Balgruuf the Greater , well Bal to me. Looked down at me from his throne. with a gold and ruby circlet above his brow. For a Nord he is a bit weedy, but alas who am I to say such things. He addressed me  by name .. Name you know ! Than, asked if I would, only be the Dragonborns' Housecarl !!!  




I didn't know my main duty of a Housecarl was to sort out the internet connections, and get decent  Cable, clearly missed the small print there. Either way we are all connected up. Ulfberth War-bear my new neighbor helped me with getting  the 50 inch Tv up stairs.

His such a charming guy, but he always got bits of Horker meat in his beard. I am not a snob but I thought the house of the Dragonborn would be in the Wind district at least. Being on the Plain district ,you can smell the Horse stables, especially on a windy morn. I can get used to that but I cant get used to is Ulfberth wife  Adrianne smashing armour at 6 am every morning. I shouldn't complain its a free house close to the market and the Bannererd Mare isn't that far down the road. I have enough time to place some Blue mountain flowers about the house to cover the scene of horse poo. Dragonborn moves in tonight am over excited.


OMG! Sinfully Riddling Dragonborn is my Thane, she didn't notice the TV I placed on her wall and she didn't use the internet but she did bring a Giants Toe,covered in garlic , that's good eatting right there. she  also brought me some new armour and a shiny sword with matching shield. Tomorrow I believe we head out to see the Greybeards. I am off to pack. By Talos beard this is going to be an epic start to 4E 201.

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