beyond the brink of madness...

the diary of tom lukes. tom can go from the nicest boy alive to being horrid and hurting. no one really understands him is their a reason for his changing behaviour ?? all he really wants is a friend .....

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1. the calm before the storm

day 1

 

run tom run !!  that was all i could think as i sprinted down the never ending corridor. i could hear the heavy footsteps behind me the  fast breathing of who ever was chasing me. it was getting closer !  i felt a heavy hand on my shoulder i knew it was all over at that very second ....

 

 

 i woke whith a start a cold sweat on my forehead.  few it was only a dream i thourght to my self.  they were getting worse. that was the third one this week and it was only thursday. but now thinking about it i would rather stay in that horrid nightmare than  have to face something way worse ...... SCHOOL! no one understood how i worked at school they all just thourght i was a freak who has no friends. ok the no friends part is true but i am not a freak i just think differently to them, like my mind was wired up differently to theirs. my form,8gy,  was ok they just ignored me which i preferred to being constantly asked stupid questions or  being poked punched or kicked. i finally hauled my self out of bed and towards the bathroom when i ran a hand through my hair and brushed my teeth  then i headed back to my room to get dressed . my school uniform was ugly bottle green blazer and tie , yuck !  running down the stairs i grabbed a slice of toast from the kitchen shouted a muffled good bye and went on my way to school.

opening the door to my form room the hushed whispering silenced for only a seconds as the class registered who was entering, but they resumed chatting as soon as they saw it was me . thats what i was to them , a dissapointment. mr groat silenced the class and called out the register in that dreary voice of his that could of bored any one to death. he rushed through the announcements  and exscused us . first period, music. mr hobb told us to pair off and learnt the new guitar peice as we had an even number some unlucky person had to work whith me i was partnered whith kate rodgers , a blonde haired girl who had broken many a boys heart, she moaned and groaned to mr hobb about having to work whith me but mr hobb didnt budge and so i ended u sitting there in silence for the whole thing whilst kate gossiped to her friend who was sitting opposite us . when presentation time came me and kate kept our heads down knowing that if we were picked we would nothing to show . the rest of day blew past apart from the general bullying from toby beaker , a big year 10 who thourght he was hard because he beat up people . i walked at a brisk  pace home i couldnt wait to get my self holed up in my little room , i wasnt a socalizing kind of person.

 

my mum called me for dinner , good old mum always stuck by me what ever i did . dad was a different story he wanted a son who was butch and fancied by all the girls , some one to be proud of i was the exact opposite of what he wanted .dinner was extremly akward, i wolfed it down whith out saying a word ,my mother  tried to make general chit chat but me and my father weren't having any of it we stayed silent i didnt wait round long enough to find out what was for pudding.

 

so yeah thats my life in all its rubbishness nothing ever happens the same day feels like its played on replay i wish i could be a different person ......

 

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