Hi, my name is Isabella. I am 16 years old.
I live with my mom, because my dad is dead. He died when I was 4. My dad was a great person. He was always happy, and loved his life. He died in a car crash.
My best friend is named Cassie. Cassie has an eating disorder. She never eats anything. I hate it. She is killing herself slowly. I tell her every day that she should eat something, anything. She does not listen.
Well you are my diary, so I can tell you anything, right? I will tell you what I think is going to happen. I think Cassie I going to die, and nobody can do anything about it. But we all love her anyways. We are going to love her until she dies, and after that. She knows she is going to die, and she is not going to do anything about it because she is Cassie, and Cassie does not give up, and her goal is to become as thin as possible, thinner than possible. She thinks she is strong because she can resist eating for a long time. When she says she or somebody else is weak, she really means she has gained weight, or that somebody cannot resist food. She tells me, that I am weak, and asks me, to join her ''diet''. She wants to help me become thin. A lot of the girls in our class call her a ghost, because she is so thin. They are jealous. They want to be as thin as Cassie. But they are not capable. Because they are, like Cassie says, weak.
My mom gave me this diary, because she thinks I need to get Cassie's problems out of my system. She says that I forget to live my life, because I'm always trying to get Cassie to eat. Of course I try to get Cassie to eat. I do not want her to die! Nobody understands that she will never be satisfied. She weighs around 40 kg. When she weighs 38 kg, she is going to want to weigh 36 kg, and it will go on, like that, until she dies. She has been in the hospital several times. She knows what to do, to get out. She gains enough weight to get out, pretends to be okay, and loses weight again when she gets out. It is that easy for her.
Today Cassie told me how weak she thinks she is getting from going to the hospital. As I told you, before, when Cassie says she is becoming weak, she means that she has gained weight. I know she is going to lose even more weight now. She is so stupid. I wish she could realize that she is the thinnest girl, in our class, in our school. Cassie is the thinnest girl I have ever seen.
I guess I will write more in you tomorrow...
Love Isabella ♥