Hey, I'm the Devil... Shh, no one knows this. I'm hiding in a 14 year old girl's body, a very nice girl in fact. You tell anyone, I'll send you straight to my volcano. Got it? Good.

Don't believe what you hear about the bible and stuff, me and Jesus are pretty tight, I nicknamed her 'Jebus Crisp', nice ring to it, don't you think? We had battles a few thousand years ago, but we got fed up and decided to make an alliance. We get on great now, I was even invited to his birthday the other day... I don't record how old he is now, well, I should say she. Did you know that God is actually a mean piece of work? He likes his parties and his drinks... He gets pretty angry if you disturb his MIGHTY slumber. Wanna know what thunder is? Him snoring. Lightening? Him turning on the light to pee. Rain? Do I have to say what that is? (Pee, for those who wouldn't piece it together). Snow is his dandruff and well, I don't want to know what fog is...

Anyway, this book is about mine and Jebus' adventures and funny stories this past few weeks, those are the only ones we can remember. Can you blame us? We're busy creating new stuff to put on earth. By the way, did you like my little surprise? Yes people, Justin Bieber was MY doing. What can I say? I'm evil.