1. inside you it devours
inside you it devours, consumes you, eats you. The lies, the secrets, all the untold stories. How should he ever understand me? my undoing is his joy, How should I tell him what i am going through? How could he understand? I really wish he would though, no one has ever made me more happy then him. I can never tell him my deepest, darkest, most feared secret. I can never tell him the truth, he will not understand me. No one ever will, it is a hard choice, but I has to keep on lying to him. I really do not know what to do, What will happen if i tell him, will I then lose him? or maybe he feels the same way? but how should I know, will I ever know. Will he ever just confess? and what if he does not feel the same way, should I then go embarrassing myself? or shall I just tell him? but how can I tell him without being direct? can I hide it in some secret code? or should I listen to my every sense and every vibe in my body, and just become creative? Will he then get hurt or embarrassed, maybe even made a fool of? I surely do not hope so.
OH how can I ever tell him? from inside it devours me, only from one question.
Does he love me back?