You aren't able to imagine how much it hurts to lose someone you love.
The pain is worse than a knife in your heart, a bullet through your head.
Your feelings is out of control and your not strong enough to keep up your good mood. Cause it isn't good, it's terribly sad.
It feels like a part of your heart is missing, a part of your life.
It can't be described how much it hurts, you can only try to describe how you feel.
You feel lost, lost in a world of misery. Your own world of misery.
It feels awful and wrong not to be able to say you love him.
Not to touch him, feel his breath against your face.
Feel his hair through your hands.
It feels wrong not to have him by your side.
The side that he hasn't left for your hole life.
It's weird that you can't share your secrets with anyone besides yourself.
Everything it's just so hard, to hard to describe.
The best way to describe it is that you can't live your life anymore.
But you have to. You need to let go and move on. It's the only right thing to do.
Just try to imagine how the person you love is sitting and looking down on you.
The person wouldn't want you to get stuck. Stuck in the past.
The person would want you to move on. Live your life.
But still the person would want you to remember the good times and bad times you shared with each other. Cause it's those moments which is the foundation of your relationship.
Without those kind of moments your relationship isn't working.
It takes years to build a relationship. A relationship where your able to trust each other, share secrets.
Trust it's truly important. Cause when you trust each other it's easier, much easier. Not just to be with each other, everything becomes easier.
But easy isn't the word to describe the pain. The pain is complicated. Way to complicated.
You'll don't know how to make your heart beat again. How to make it beat normal like your living. Cause when you lose someone, you feel like you aren't alive, like your in another universe all by yourself.
The universe is black and you aren't able to see anything. You are left alone with your own feelings and pain. There is no way out. The pain will never go away.
Even if you think it's gone it's still there, just buried a place inside of you.
You will still be able to feel the pain, to feel the loss.
But it's not sure that you are able to identify it.
You are going to feel so much pain in your life, so much that you could fill the entire ocean.
You can try to push the pain away, you can try to avoid it. But there doesn't exists a life without pain. If there did it wouldn't feel like living.
Love and pain goes together like a packages.
There is no such thing as love without pain or pain without love.
Somehow the pain will find you, so will love. Don't lose hope, even if you lose the love of your life. It's painful. But maybe the pain is good for you.
It will remind you of what you had together, the moments you shared.
The pain will prove that it was real. That the love you shared was real. That everything was real.
So don't forget, pain can be a good thing. Even if it doesn't feel like it.