Stuck In Fire 1 - Kapitel 1-17 (Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez)

Bøh :) ik min novelle. Læs originalen her: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4819806/1/The_Red_Line

2Likes
0Kommentarer
5391Visninger
AA

5. 5

I was sitting at my little kitchen counter, writing in my notebook at 8am the next morning. Sleeping with Justin last night had not been the least little bit awkward and that was all because of him.

He didn't smother me all night in the bed and for that I was glad. Once I had drifted off to sleep, he rolled over and took his side of the large bed, letting me sleep undisturbed. So I actually did get some sleep, and I was thankful for that.

I think I was the first one to open my eyes when the alarm clock went off this morning at 7:30 am. I quickly hit the snooze button at the horrid buzzing sound and then I rolled onto my back, peeking over at Justin, hoping it didn't disturb him.

I nearly gasped at how beautiful he was asleep. I didn't even look at his chiseled chest yet. It was his face that captured me. His lips were drawn up in a little pout that reminded me of a little child, stubborn but sweet. His mouth was so perfect and the lips were so full and soft looking it made me want to kiss him all the time.

And his eyes closed drew me in even more. Look at those eyelashes, they're longer than mine! Black in color, so noticeable against his very fair skin, if you looked very fast it almost looked like he wore eyeliner but now in the sun, this close, I could see, even along his bottom eyelid, those amazing lashes. I almost reached out to touch them but decided against that. Justin would just love to wake up being poked in the eye by me, I'm sure.

I smiled, seeing a little stubble on his face and wondered what he'd look like with three days worth of it, his hair longer, to his shoulders. Yes, I already know I have a fascination with the bad boy types.

I have analyzed myself for years, using my own brain as a subject. Now was my first time doing it to someone else.

I was already mad at myself for messing this up. I was close to Justin, too close, already. How can I ask him things about his life or his work and then lay down underneath him at night and not think of the things he'd said?

I love belonging to you.

Why did that make me feel happy and sad at the same time?

Smiling at him, I looked at him a few minutes longer. I love the way his arms were drawn up under his face, hugging the quilt to himself, turned towards my side, as if he were looking at the back of my head when he fell asleep. Maybe that's just my own wishful thinking.

Hugging himself. The way he sleeps said a lot about his mind. I wonder if he's ever been really held, without being naked or after sexual intercourse. Probably not for a very long time, if at all. I know there are always two sides to every story but I found myself hating his mother.

I can see a father being hard and cold but his mother is supposed to love him, nurture him, teach him love. And he is her only child. How could she not love that face? And I'll bet when he was little he was 10,000 times more adorable. I wonder what his voice sounded like back then. And then I imagined a little Justin trying to get his mother's attention and her blowing him off. I wanted to track her down and just slap her.

I know, I sound like a typical shrink, blaming Mommy right away.

Switching gears, I remembered nicer things…

Last night had been so amazing, I was still feeling good even now. My crotch felt much better now, not so super sensitive and not even a little sore, as it was last night. No, now…it just felt extremely happy and I think if it could've given a deep happy sigh, it would have.

I love his eyebrows. They look shaped, as if he does something to make the corner such a sharp point like that. Staring at them now, I marveled at how dark they were in comparison to his skin and hair color. I would think his eyebrows would match his hair, a bronze-ish color. I wonder if he dyes his hair or has it done. It's possible, he's in the entertainment industry. Oh man, listen to me. I make him sound like a corporate mogul.

I wanted to lean over and kiss that cute little mouth he was wearing now, but I'm sure I have morning breath. And we ate shrimp and garlic last night. YIKES! I held my hand over my mouth and turned away from him a little. I have to hide a little toothbrush and glass of water with a basin under my side of the bed from now on. A makeup artist stashed under there wouldn't be such a terrible idea, either.

Then, the alarm rang again and I jumped, lunging over to hit it again with an annoyed smack.

I peeked at Justin and he didn't move a hair. He's a heavy sleeper. I'll bet he's not used to getting up this early, in his line of work. How do I get out without waking him up? Should I shake him or something? This stuff always looks so easy in the movies. The couple wakes up at the same time and cuddle for a few minutes and have clever, witty banter before the man gets up and shows his naked ass to the cameras. Why can't life be as easy as that?

Oh my GOD! I'm naked under here! I almost forgot about that. Although it did feel very nice having my bare skin under the quilt all night. I could see why Justin preferred to sleep this way. It was very natural, very relaxing.

Only now the sun is up and I feel very weird walking around naked. I cringed at myself, ashamed after Justin had gone through such lengths to make me feel comfortable about our nudity. But 12 years of catholic school cannot just be wiped away after only one night, even by someone as talented as Justin.

I hope he doesn't think I'm walking around naked all day now and that he is too. I could never get my school work done.

Today in school I had to let my professor know what my paper would be based on and I'd have to give a little information on Justin. Nothing too deep yet, just some basic info about him, what I think makes him so interesting.

Our professor is Dr. James Collier and he is about Justin's age, I think, around 27 or 28 years old. I pictured his short, cropped blonde hair and icy blue eyes, he always had stubble on his face, too.

Us three girls all had a bit of a crush on him but I had managed to keep myself focused and very professional with him. I knew I couldn't tell him that I was getting orgasms from my subject the night before but I did want to ask him some things privately, which he was always willing to do after class, unlike some professors who made you book an appointment with them.

It was part of our assignment, if we ever got stuck or had questions about how to proceed with our subject, he wanted us to come to him. We are dealing with people, after all, and he didn't want us doing anything to cause anyone harm. He would never let us have a suicidal subject, for instance. We weren't ready for that kind of pressure yet. And if anything like that ever came up, we were supposed to call James or 911 immediately.

Dr. Collier, I should call him, not James. He was always very cool and not stiff like most other teachers. I'm sure I could talk to him and he could give me a little help.

I waited there, laying in bed for a couple minutes more and then knew I couldn't put it off any longer. I had to pee. Slowly, I began to sit up, watching Justin like a hawk the entire time. He didn't move. He sleeps like a dead person. (LOL)

I bit my bottom lip and slipped my body out from under the quilt as if it weighed a ton. I was out, Justin still asleep and I crossed my arms over my breasts, tiptoeing out of the bedroom, my eyes staring at him as I went.

UGH! I tripped and fell to the floor like a slab of hamburger. My breasts felt like they popped upon impact and were probably even flatter than they were before! Perfect! What the hell was that? I looked near my feet and saw that I had tripped over Justin's sneakers.

Oh God, please don't wake up, please don't wake up, please, please, please!

I popped my head up like a gopher out of a hole, seeing through my straw hair that half covered my eyes, he was still there, but began to groan lightly in his throat and rolled over onto his stomach now, curling his arms around his pillow, his face still peaceful and content looking.

How is he this comfortable in a stranger's bed?

And in the middle of this, I started to psycho analyze him again.

He's hugging the pillow now. Hugging his mother? Hugging the girl he used to love?

Jesus, Selena, maybe he just likes hugging the pillow and there is no deeper meaning behind it, COULDN'T THAT BE POSSIBLE?

I had to get out of here now, before he really wakes up. Crawling on the floor fast, I scurried like a mouse to the bathroom, daring to stand now and grabbing my bathrobe, putting it on quickly. God, please tell me he's not really awake and saw me crawling around the apartment naked, please! I'll owe you forever.

While inside the bathroom, as I used the toilet, and brushed my teeth twice and tried to brush my hair down to non-afro size, I almost felt afraid to go back out there. I half expected to see him sitting up in bed, fully awake, laughing at me. I would simply die then and would get gypped out of 13 more days of bliss, which would be just my luck.

I saw a couple of his personal bathroom things here now, his toothbrush – a black and red one, and a spray deodorant.

And I smiled, liking these little personal touches of his, as I went back to my impossible hair.

Damn, I should never go to bed with wet hair, I always look like Don King the next day! Of course, Justin's wet hair just dries and pops into place after he runs his finger through it. DAMN him! Jeez, I'm jealous of Justin's beauty now. Maybe I could be my own subject again. God knows I need the help maybe more than he does.

I heard the TV switch on in the living room outside and I froze, my hands in midair around my head as I listened, my eyes wider now. He's up.

I heard channels being switched and smiled, wondering what he'd choose.

News ? CLICK. No. Good, I hate the news. It's never good.

A workout show? CLICK. No. Good, I hate people who wake up and start working out.

Sponge Bob cartoon? I smiled, waiting for the click again and for the next sounds but it stayed on. I heard the remote touch the table gently and my mouth immediately opened into a horrified oval shape, my brows coming together.

Oh my God, he is watching Sponge Bob? I covered my mouth, afraid I'd start laughing like the village idiot.

Why is he watching THAT? He knows I'm awake and in here. Doesn't he care what I would think about this? Maybe he's playing with me again. He has that kind of warped sense of humor.

I would rather believe anything else besides the fact that he likes watching Sponge Bob every morning. He's smart, not retarded. But it's still on. I heard movement in the kitchen now. The cabinets opening and closing, the refrigerator door closing. He was going to cook again?

I feel so guilty about this but I can't deny that I like watching him cook. And I love eating his food. He's a great little chef.

My mother never liked to cook much and I'd always have a pop tart or something for breakfast everyday. And now that I lived alone, I hated cooking for just myself. It was depressing.

I would usually eat at the cafeteria or a couple of places around school. Eating alone just sucks and there's no way of sugar coating that. Rosalie and Alice ate with me sometimes, but they lived with their parents nearby and usually ate with them.

It is nice, having someone here with me, I decided. Coming home last night and having someone here to say hello to me really felt good. And Justin's helloes are just phenomenal.

I hoped it wouldn't feel too weird talking to Justin now, after last night. No, I instantly thought, he never makes me feel weird, just good and special…and pretty…and nervous.

"Hey, Gary, where are you?" Sponge Bob was calling when I decided to take a deep breath and come out. Justin may have to use the toilet and I didn't want him cursing me internally for taking all day while he danced around the kitchen, waiting for relief.

I turned the knob and pulled, trying to open the door in a very cool way and come gliding out, all casually and grown-up.

But, of course, the door is stuck again.

"No." I breathed, shaking, my eyes gaping at the rusty dark brown knob, "Please, no. Not now."

This happens all the time. Crap door, crap doorknob!

No !

Why? Why now?

God truly hates me. I turned the doorknob all the way and pulled harder, jerking it. Sometimes this works. Of course, now, any illusions I had about entering the living room in a cool way were at the bottom of a cliff, burning in a twisted heap.

The noises of a jerking door, of wood uselessly hitting wood over and over rung loudly through the air as if to call out, 'The raging dork is stuck in the bathroom!'

I can do this. Put some elbow grease into it, girl! Come on! Jerking the knob again, I began making little grunting sounds as I thought it gave way a little bit for a second, but…it didn't.

It was inevitable and unavoidable. But it would now happen. And here he comes….

"Selena?" a deep voice was on the other side of the door, "Are you okay?"

He sounded amused out there, it wasn't obvious, but I heard it.

I braced my right foot against the wall beside the door and demanded it silently now to open or I'd take it off the hinges TODAY!

"I'm okay." I called through the door, even now trying to sound light and adult, "The door just sticks sometimes. I've got it."

Move, you fucker, move NOW! I was mentally talking to the door now, not Justin.

"Okay." He said and I heard him walk away. I listened for snickering or laughter but heard none. All I could hear were Sponge Bob and another cartoon voice, laughing at me.

I felt my mouth snarling now as I yanked with all my body weight, shoving my foot harder against the wall, making little, sharper pulls of the knob now. God, I sound like I'm trying to escape a locked closet, a desperate prisoner.

Panic began to set in, knowing people needed to use the toilet first thing in the morning, I always did. I'm sure Justin wants to get in here and is probably hating my guts right now. The only other place he could use would be the kitchen sink. Oh no, gross!

Every other time this door opens after a few jerks on it! Today, of course, it's going to be stubborn and act like CEMENT!

I hate my life.

I heard water running out in the kitchen and figured he was doing dishes. Man! How can he run the water first thing in the morning and not have to urinate? Maybe he is a robot.

A few more minutes passed by and all I heard from Justin was the sloshing of water and dishes, along with the cartoon he was watching.

I gave in finally, panting and admitting defeat. What would I do now? Call him? God, embarrassing. Knock? No, stupid! But he was clearly not coming after me again on his own so I closed my eyes, letting my face fall into my sore, red hands as I swallowed my pride and made myself call, "Justin?"

The water went off and I heard the padding of his footsteps slowly approaching the door.

"Yes, Selena?" he purred, acting like he had no idea what I wanted.

He can be quite a little creep, I observed.

I glanced at my bright red face in the mirror to my left and closed my eyes.

"I can't open the door, it's too stuck." I forced the words out, wanting to crawl into a hole and die.

"Oh I see." He sounded like he was smiling.

My face turned angry in once second and I felt myself set my jaw.

"Can you help me?" I asked, feeling sick to my stomach now. He was making me ask him for help, knowing how humiliating it is for me. Is this more payback for yesterday's questions…or maybe today's?

"Perhaps." He answered, oozing with power, "Or…I could just let you sit in there all day. That might be fun. You could be my own personal prisoner. But I don't think I could slide any food under this door."

Wow, that does sound pretty good. But, wait, no, I have classes today.

"Justin, please?" I breathed, almost trembling now, his voice really doing things to me, "I have real important classes today."

"Hmmm…" his voice was so smooth, "That is a problem. Poor little Selena…"

I growled in my head. He was playing with me again. I thought he was the toy here, not me. No. He is not a toy, don't say that, I scolded myself. He is just playful and childlike sometimes. I like that part of him…most of the time.

"Justin…" I whined a little now, acting like a four year old myself, "You said you'd be a good little…boy." I changed the word toy to boy, hoping he wouldn't catch that. I would never demean him or call him a toy. I want him to see himself as more than that. He already was more than that…to me.

And that was enough to make him stop toying with me.

"Alright, fair Selena, stand back! I will save thee!" He made me smile as he did an over-the-top prince type voice, as if he was coming to my rescue. He is too cute.

Jerk.

I got back as far as I could, standing in the open shower. There was not much room in here and I really didn't want to be killed by a door flying open.

This should be good, I thought, waiting to see what would happen next.

With one hard kick and the sound of his foot against the wood of the door, it flew open hard, smashing into the wall and making a medium sized hole in the cheap drywall behind it.

I had given a little yelp when the door came flying open, not expecting him to open it so fast. It was REALLY stuck HARD! I used all my might and couldn't budge it. God, I am so weak. I have to start drinking milk.

Justin came in a bit, moving the knob a little towards himself, and peeking behind it, seeing the white powder on the floor, the gaping black hole staring back at him.

God, he kicked the door open with one kick…and he has no shoes on. I am so turned on right now.

"Ooops." He cringed a little, looking at the hole and then to me with apology in his eyes, "I'll fix that, Selena."

I couldn't help but smile at him.

"Don't worry about it." I stayed where I was, mesmerized by the sight of him standing there only wearing a cotton pair of tight gray shorts.

He looked at me and his eyes sunk deeply into mine.

"Are YOU alright?" he asked, concerned about me now.

"Yea, fine," I felt my cheeks flush a little, "I just always get stuck in here with that damn door. Thanks."

I was so embarrassed and could only imagine what he was thinking about me. I'll bet non-geeks only pay him $10,000 for two weeks of his time.

"Well, I have saved you, fair Selena." He strode in, doing his regal voice again, his eyes burning into mine, he was nose to nose with me when he asked, "What prize shall you bestow upon me?"

You can have anything of mine you want, I almost said, if I had anything worth getting. But I had a strong feeling he wasn't asking for any THING.

God, his eyes are deadly I noticed again as they worked their spell on me. Maybe he slipped something special into my eggs yesterday and now whenever he's near me I turn into a quivering heap of stupid.

I didn't know what else to say except to squeak out, "A kiss?"

I cleared my throat, not wanting to sound like Mr. Bill.

"Mmmmm…yes." He smiled and opened his mouth, closing it over my lips, his one hand leaning on the shower door, the other on the tile wall.

I was so glad I brushed my teeth and tongue twice. But, even though he didn't brush yet, he tasted wonderful. How does he DO that?

He kissed me over and over again and my head was becoming dizzy. I didn't know it at the time, but my body moved back, still standing in the shower, until my back was against the tile.

Not letting me get away from him, he followed me into the shower, stepping in and pulling the shower door closed behind him, all while still kissing me with expert style.

I heard my voice whimper, hoping he didn't turn the water on us.

"Stop trying to get away from me." He purred, kissing me a little harder, "I don't like it."

"Sorry." I breathed, unable to get away from him anymore, and not wanting to.

His arms rested on the tile walls at my sides as his tongue gently probed in, moving softly at first.

I kissed him back, doing what came natural with my lips, hoping it was feeling good for him, too. I am so damn inexperienced. I hate that.

Then he actually whimpered! WOW, I made HIM whimper? I rock !

"Selena…" he whispered, his right hand moved down and pulled my bathrobe belt, opening the robe as I clenched my fists at my sides, never knowing what to do with my hands. Damn hands!

"Here." He seemed to read my mind and took my hands into his, shaking them out as he grinned at me, still nose to nose with me, "Touch me, Selena."

He brought my hands to rest on his lower back while he went back to kissing me. I felt my hands move up and down his back. He is so warm and soft, his skin is like a baby's. Not the way it looks, the way it FEELS, only tight coiled muscle beneath the silky soft surface.

It took only seconds for my hands to wander down to his shorts, stroking down the firmness of his buttocks, my fingers curling inward a bit.

His voice moaned into my open mouth as his right hand moved down my jumbled up stomach, his fingers stroking softly up and down my clit again. I gasped, opening my eyes. No, not again…not right now…no more…it needs rest! Doesn't it?

My body immediately remembered those fingers and woke right up, smiling happily and leaping up and down like an eager puppy wanting its Master. But it was all happening inside me.

"Ummm…" I heard my voice talking, even though I didn't want to be talking, "Don't you have to go to the bathroom?"

WHAT? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I AM A FRIGGING RETARD!

He smiled and squinted slightly but kept kissing and licking my lips.

"Not at the moment." He murmured, kissing me quickly again, "But thanks for asking."

"Sorry." I was saying again, "I don't know what's wrong with me." KISS.

"I think I was dropped on my head as a baby." I was talking into his mouth.

KISS.

"Nothing is wrong with you." He kissed me again. We were sliding slowly down the tile wall, towards the bottom of the tub. Oh no, what is he doing?

"Ummm…Justin…what time is it?" I was talking again.

"Shut up, Selena." He demanded softly, devouring my lips again.

That is a very good suggestion. Shut up, Selena. Yes. I will do that now. Thank you, Justin.

Before I knew it, I was laying on the porcelain and his lips were traveling down my neck, my robe opening more. His hand on my breast, squeezing, cupping…his mouth wetly moving over my nipple as his hand held it helplessly in place.

"Uhhhh…" I looked up at the ceiling, heavily breathing again. I was his slave.

He is the most dangerous creature of all. A predator after my heart, already digging his fangs inside me. Everything about him lures me in – his face, his voice…even his smell. As if I could tell him no….as if I could fight him off…or would want to. Worse than a killer…he was designed to seduce. And he had conquered every other woman before me, more experienced, more worldly than I. He is going to kill me. He is going to break my heart.

He was now conquering and seducing ME, so easily…too easily.

I have never wanted a man this much…in my life. I want him now.

And he told me to trust him. I so want to…but something inside me keeps saying…"Don't."

But even now, with my mind knowing all this, and after only one night, I can't control my thirst for him…I want him, I need him, I CRAVE him. He is like a drug to me…one I itch and suffer physically without…he is like my own personal brand of heroin. I hated being in school yesterday without him and today it's going to suck even more. Time without him was pointless and cruel.

I don't know if I can control myself. I am under his control now. I am caught in his trap. He has me.

I can't read his mind…and he won't let me in it. I wish he would tell me what he's thinking. I'm so afraid that any second now, he'll just disappear, a sinful, marvelous dream that poofs up into smoke as soon as the sun has risen.

"You have no idea…how long I've waited for you." My voice panted lovingly as his eyes opened and soaked deeply down into my bones, then moved up to my glistening eyes. My legs were open and he was laying between them…and I felt his body harden against me.

If he asks me to explain that…I don't even know if I can. I just FEEL it.

After a silent pause his voice curled like heat around me.

"You don't have to wait anymore, Selena." He said in a low voice, "I am here…and I want you. I want you so badly."

I didn't know what to say. In my brain things were moving a mile a minute, trying to find a way out of going to school today.

Justin looked at where we were and looked at me apologetically, "But perhaps this is not the right time and place."

I felt the tears in my eyes thicken as he slowly moved back to a standing position, bringing me up with him, gently closing up my robe and tying a single knot with the belt. He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead.

"It's alright, Selena." He promised with his voice, "I will wait for you. When you are ready, I'll be there. We have plenty of time. Sorry about…that. (he motioned with his head to the shower floor)…we always seem to wind up in the shower. There must be some magic in here."

There is magic wherever you are.

God, I am falling fast. I think I'm already in love with him. I am such a tool.

"Come on, I'll make you some breakfast." He led me out of the shower, watching me step out so I wouldn't kill myself. He kept holding my hand, leading me into the kitchen, sitting me on the stool.

In my mind, for a second, I was at the club Fire and he was leading me to that private room.

Placing a kiss on the top of my head, he went to get me a glass of orange juice, placing it down in front of me.

"Drink." He smiled seductively and turned away, putting the juice in the fridge, and then he came back, placing my notebook down next to my drink, a pen on top of it.

"Do your homework and I'll be right back." Justin was now moving to the bathroom, "I was fine until you SAID it!"

Oh, now he has to pee. I laughed to myself a little, hoping he didn't get locked in there now. But he was smart enough to leave the door ajar an inch. I tried not to listen to the water hitting water, opening my notebook and trying to focus my mind now, hoping I wasn't so far gone that I couldn't do my work anymore.

Now I am sitting here, listening to Justin brush his teeth and my hand began to write:

I love your hair.

I love your skin.

I love touching you.

I love pleasing you.

I love belonging to you.

Where did this come from? My hand was like acting on its own, writing all the things he had said to me last night.

Selena, do you see a theme here? Shit.

He was coming back and I slammed my book shut, tossing my pen away from me, onto the counter.

My brain wanted me to be mad at him when he came back to the kitchen. But as soon as I saw him with his bare chest and perfect little ass stuffed into those soft looking shorts…and the perfect bare feet…I couldn't do it.

Studying him is getting more complicated than I thought. I was learning all kinds of new things about me as well.

"What time do you have to go today?" Justin asked, unsure of my plans.

"Oh, in an hour." I peeked at the wall clock over the stove, "I will probably get home around 2 o'clock this afternoon."

"Alright then I have to move my ass then." He said, playful and light again, leaning over the counter on his arms, looking at me, "What would you like to eat this morning?"

I gave him a smile, my bad girl side emerging again.

"Wowwwww…" Justin purred with a smile, "Look at that evil smile! I am very impressed! And after only one night ….you fascinate me."

I bit my bottom lip and blushed, unsure why his words made me feel so good.

"Toast is fine, if that's okay." I made it easy for him today, I really wasn't very hungry. Finding out I'm the biggest sucker on earth is doing things to my stomach.

"That's all?" he looked a little disappointed.

I nodded, smirking at him.

"Do you feel alright?" he asked, now looking concerned, taking the bread out of the refrigerator.

"Are you kidding?" I scoffed, "I feel wonderful. I'm gonna be a wreck today in school thinking about last night."

He smiled, putting the bread into the toaster slots, pressing it down with the lever.

"You're gonna think about me in school today?" he looked surprised and happy about this.

"Definitely." I admitted, drinking my juice.

"I'll think of you, too, Selena." He bit his own bottom lip now, looking at me, waiting for the toast, "I haven't had that good a time in a long time."

I smiled, loving the sound of his voice and loving every single thing he uttered.

Trying to get my professionalism back, if it wasn't too late, I came back with, "Well now that we've had our good time, when I come home, we have an appointment. Don't be late."

The toast popped up and it was nice and light, exactly how I liked it.

"Butter on it?" he asked me.

"Please." I grinned, watching him get the butter and start to spread it on the hot toast, "Did you hear what I said…about our appointment?"

"Yes I heard you." He said in a friendly voice, "I will be here, on time, on the couch like a good little patient, Dr. Selena."

He placed the toast down in front of me and grinned, going over to wash last night's dishes now. I really hate seeing him doing these things for me but damn it, I do love seeing him wash a dish. I have no idea why, either. It excites me.

I have to make a note of that.

Is he making fun of me when he says Dr. Selena? I wish I knew. I would have to address this today, amongst other things.

"Umm, Selena?" he looked up and kept washing, "I have small plans today, nothing much, just a bachlorette party that starts at 12. It should be over by 1 or 1:30, but I will come right home afterwards. I take the train so, just in case I am a few minutes late, I don't want you to think I'm blowing you off or anything. Is that alright?"

He always asks me if everything is alright. Like he's afraid of me or something. He really is working with the mindset that I DO actually own him and that bothers me. And he is always to easily bending to my wants, and his 'yes, Selena' every time I say something to him. He is so obedient, like a pet and that disturbs me too. How am I going to get through to him? I have to think this over in school today and get that advice from Dr. Collier.

I decided to try something here, even though we weren't in a session right now.

"Justin…" I tried to keep my voice pleasant, "What if I told you…no, it's not alright? I want you to stay here all day and not move from that chair. Would you do it?"

"Yes." He said without even thinking about it, licking the butter off his thumb as he put the butter away, "Do you want me dressed or undressed?"

I let a breath out that told him I was astounded. My mouth hung open in shock at him. But he looked like everything was perfectly normal.

"What?" he asked, smiling a little.

I couldn't smile back this time. I felt such a feeling of pity for him that I couldn't help.

"That would be 5 hours, Justin, sitting in a chair, not moving." I informed, spelling it out further for him.

"That's easy." He shrugged, "I have no problem with it, if it's what you want."

"Well I do." I heard my voice reply, "I shouldn't be allowed to tell you to do something like that – no one should. You should tell me that you're going to do what you want to do and that I can't order you around. You would lose money if I told you not to go to your appointment today. You would get in trouble with your boss. Doesn't that bother you?"

"It doesn't matter." He shrugged, "I belong to you now and you rule what I do. If you tell me to do something, I'm going to do it. My feelings don't matter here. I'm here for you, Selena."

"I rule?" I couldn't even finish the sentence, staggered.

I had to calm down, I had to maintain a calm façade no matter what he said. That's the heart of being a psychiatrist, not to react so strongly that you alienate your patient. But I had broken the rules. I care about him and I was mad at him for being like this, for saying these things. But I should want him to say what he's thinking, even if it IS insane.

"Your toast is getting cold, Selena." He tried to change the subject.

"Wait." I looked at him, putting a clean wet dish in the drying rack beside him, "Justin, listen, I don't want you to act anymore, okay? I want you to be yourself during our two weeks. From now on, if you feel something, if you don't like something, or have something on your mind you want to say, I want you to say it and do it. Can you do that for me?"

"What do you mean?" he looked confused, "Act?"

And yes, Sponge Bob was still playing but he wasn't paying attention to it so I let that go for now.

"I know that you must play a certain part when you do what you do for a living." I began nicely, staying relaxed, "And maybe after awhile, it becomes who you are…like you get used to it and pretty soon, you don't even have a will of your own anymore. You know? Like…what are YOUR opinions? What do YOU like? Like, for example, last night, when you went to kiss my foot, why did you do that?"

"It was pretty." He looked at me, answering honestly without a pause.

"And you stopped. Why?" I asked, taking a bite of my toast so he wouldn't get upset.

"You told me to." He said, sounding so innocent to my ears all of a sudden.

"But if you wanted to, why couldn't you just say, no Selena, I want to kiss your feet and I will?" I asked.

"No." his eyes looked harder now, "I don't want you to be angry with me."

"But if you—"

"And besides that, you own me." He cut in, adding another reason in.

"Justin, you are a person." I kept cool even though I wanted to yell at him and shake him, "No one can OWN anyone. You are not owned by me. You are helping me out with my paper and you are also helping me out with…other….things. But I don't own you, Justin. I would never act like I did, either. I know a lot of people have treated you that way. But you must know it's not really true that I own you. Don't you?"

"I understand what you're saying, Selena." His voice sounded wise now suddenly, "And I appreciate the sentiment behind that. But you forget one thing. You have paid me twenty thousand dollars. For 13 more days, you DO own me. If you tell me to sit, I'll sit. If you tell me to eat dog food, I will. If you hurt me, I will still stay here. I've sold myself to you, Selena. I have lost any say I have in myself. That's what it means being a wh-"

He stopped himself but I knew what he was going to call himself. I had lots of work to do with him. I don't think I am good enough to rescue him. My first patient. My first love. Yes, damn it, I love him. I am such a moron. How did I fall in love in one day? Oh yea, seven orgasms.

"Don't be angry with me, please?" he almost pleaded, his eyes doing the same. He was finished with the dishes and dried his hands.

God, listen to how scared he is that I'm angry with him. He wants to please everyone. He is terrified of not being approved of. That's from his parents. Never getting their time or approval, he is so afraid of the same happening with really anyone who he comes across in his life. And with that means, he would do anything they said as long as they showed him their praise and appreciation. Justin… I wanted to cry.

"I don't want to fight with you, Selena." He was walking slowly towards me, coming around behind me. His arms came around me and held me close to him. Right under my chin, his muscular arms folded over me like angels' wings. His lips touched my temple and he said, "I will answer all your questions from now on, I promise. I will try. But I'm afraid of how you'll see me once you know all about me. I will look ugly to you."

"No you won't, Justin." I gently touched his arms with my hands, rubbing them, "You're beautiful. You'll never be ugly to me."

His lips kissed my cheek so deeply and he moved his hands down my arms, entwining his fingers into mine, resting his chin on my shoulder.

He didn't talk for a long time and I would have to leave for school soon. I wasn't angry with Justin, I just wanted him to stop seeing himself as a thing. A toy, a slave, a dancer. It would take time, a lot longer than 2 weeks to make him see that. But I only have two weeks.

I hated thinking of Justin leaving me and going to belong to some other bitch who'd make him eat dog food and kneel naked in her doorway. Mostly because, I knew he would do it if she paid him to. I wanted to know how he got into this life, what changed him into what he is today, what pain crushed his spirit so badly.

I had to start rolling up my sleeves and getting to work. Hard questions had to be answered. I didn't have time to NOT ask them to spare his feelings because I was falling for him. Even if he gets angry with me, I have to try to help him and break through his walls.

If I failed and anything horrible happened to him at the hands of someone, I could never forgive myself.

"Alright, Justin." I kissed his arm, "Two o' clock is our appointment. If you're late, that's fine. But try to be on time."

He let me stand up and get my own backpack. I put my notebook and pen inside it, zipping it up.

"Go to your appointment today." I turned to him, looking him in the eyes. He looked so fragile suddenly, "And we'll talk when I get home. Alright?"

Then he smiled with relief. Is that because I'm not angry with him?

"Yes, Selena." He agreed, using his trademark phrase, "Thank you."

I wasn't sure what he was thanking me for but I said, "You're welcome," anyway.

"See you later." I almost walked out the door but then turned around, seeing his face watching me.

"Come here." I smiled at him, unable to resist that face.

He came up to me, smiling, putting his hands on the sides of my face and before his lips descended upon mine, he purred, "You remembered."

"Like I would FORGET to kiss you goodbye." I said, feeling his lips, so perfectly wet and soft, smooth like hot water. He tastes soo good.

He gave me a deep, earth shattering kiss this morning. I would have to lecture him more often before I left.

Finally, he released me, probably hoping we were still friends. I had to wait a second for my eyes to stop shivering before I began to move out the door.

Justin looked like he was trying not to laugh at me and I wondered why.

"Have a good day, Selena." He smiled from ear to ear.

"You too." I smiled up at him, wondering what his problem was, "See you later, doll face."

He looked down as I left and then I heard a little snicker escape his lips.

I decided to ignore that and kept walking down the hall, not hearing the door close yet.

"I can't…" I heard his deep buttery voice mumble to himself and I turned, afraid he meant he can't stay with me anymore. Maybe I had gone too far with what I said. I was ready to start begging when he was walking up to me.

"Selena?" he put his hands on my shoulders.

"Yes?" I frowned, confused.

His smile showed again and he tried to stop doing it, holding in a laugh I could tell.

"What?"

"Don't you think…you should wear something else to school?" he asked, keeping a semi-straight face.

I looked down and saw my short little pink care bears bathrobe, almost open in front with the single knot tie very loose.

"OH FUCK!" I shouted, not believing myself and my missing BRAIN.

Justin burst out laughing, following me as I raced myself into the apartment. I even almost shut the door on him as he tried to cross the threshold to come in but he just kept laughing, falling to his knees, holding his stomach as I slammed the door to my bedroom to get dressed.

"Now he decides to be his own little person." I grumbled, hearing his laughter becoming louder out there. I smiled, laughing too. Hearing him cast its spell over me and hating it, I was laughing harder, too.

Trying to talk between laughs, Justin was panting, saying, "Your psych teacher would've loved to see you….come to school that way….I'm sure…"

"Shut up." I laughed, throwing a pillow at his face.

"Your cute little knees…" he kept laughing, out of breath, "And a care bear on the back of your robe! In a college!"

His laughter was suffocating him and I was glad.

When I came out of my room in jeans and a t-shirt, he was laying face down on the floor, still hysterical. I think I even saw his eyes tearing up.

"Wait, Selena WAIT!" he grabbed my leg as I tried to walk past him, trying to quiet his laugh.

"What you silly little house elf?" I randomly called him, my bag on my shoulder.

"Was that Grumpy Bear on the back ?" he burst out laughing again.

Smiling, I jerked my leg free and joked, "Maybe I change my mind about you being yourself if this is what you're like! Go back to being your little obedient self!"

I was in the hallway while Justin kept laughing and he was calling, "WAIT Selena, WAIT!"

"What?" I spun around, half smiling at him as he now laid on his bare back, in my open doorway, holding the door open a bit.

"I'll miss you." He smiled, sounding very serious now, even though he was still smiling and his eyes glistened.

"I'll miss you too, you dope." I grinned, not wanting to, walking away, the giggles of Justin Bieber sending me away with a smile on my lips and a laugh in my heart.

Maybe I can help him after all. Please God, let me help him.

I rushed to class, hoping I could get some answers there from Dr. Collier. I tried to get my brain to work now that I wasn't near Justin. It seemed on DUH mode whenever I was in that man's presence. I had to focus.

Vær en del af Movellas nuFind ud a, hvad det er alle snakker om. Tilmeld dig nu og del din kreativitet og det, du brænder for
Loading ...