Stuck In Fire 1 - Kapitel 1-17 (Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez)

Bøh :) ik min novelle. Læs originalen her: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4819806/1/The_Red_Line

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10. 10

I opened my eyes and could still feel his face on my body. Slowly rubbing the sleep out of my eyes, I tried not to move too much so I wouldn't awaken him. Last night had been wonderful and I think a huge breakthrough for both of us, but I noticed over the course of the night how hard it was for Justin to have me hold him.

I had suspected that he was silently crying at a few points throughout the night but he never made any big sounds or sobs. But I felt wetness against my robe here and there, and then there was the sniffling. Or maybe Justin is getting a cold. Yea, right, in May.

Once or twice, he even began to move off of me and go to his own side of the bed, but I didn't release him. I hated to admit it but the holding all night was not only for his benefit, but mine, too.

I have never had anyone to hold like this, to caress and pet and love like this before. And I know, before I even realize it…he'll be packing his things and leaving, and I will never hear his voice or see those pained, soft eyes again.

I could always go to Fire and find him there if I miss him enough. Ugh. Pathetic. Justin will think I'm some psycho stalker or something. And the thought of him working while I'm sitting there, pining away over him…YUK. No, I won't be doing that. It would make us both uncomfortable and just remind me more that Justin did a job with me, and that's all it meant to him, and now it's over. And unless I had another $20,000 squirreled away somewhere, he would really want nothing to do with me.

Worse, I'd have to watch him be fondled and licked by those women and I'd probably get arrested for tearing their hair out.

But he did say he thought of me as a friend.

Grow up, Selena, he probably says that to EVERY woman. How do you know he's not playing you right now? No, I argued with myself, that's crazy. I have nothing else he wants. What would he want with me, besides my money?

Oh God. A paranoid thought crept into my mind. Maybe this has something to do with my Dad. He is a chief of police. Maybe Justin has some kind of score to settle with him…No. I found Justin, not the other way around. Stupid me.

Why do I keep doubting him? Why can't I trust him?

Then I heard Justin's voice from last night, saying, "You know why."

I let the stupid thoughts of revenge against my father go and started to stroke Justin's arm again, the one that was laying across my stomach while his sleeping angel face rested snugly on my chest. My lips gently touched down on his head, letting my nose get tickled by the wavy spikes of bronze hair that almost sparkled in the upcoming sunlight.

You are terribly and utterly beautiful…I thought to him. I bent my head around a little and got a little peek at his face in the light now and I smiled, stifling a little giggle.

His lips were again pouting out a little and they looked so soft and thick I wanted to kiss them off his face, which was, sadly streaked slightly with once wet lines.

My heart hurts so much for him, and though I was embarrassed to admit it, Justin's tears had really frightened me last night. I never saw a man cry before and it shook me.

But again, this is something I have to get used to and deal with if I'm going to be a good doctor someday. I feel like I have to shut my feelings off in order to do this job right. But aren't feelings and emotions what this job is all about? Why must I be a hard ass to my patient to help him properly? Why can't I hold them and take their hand and shed tears with them?

Once I thought of doing that for hundreds of patients, day in and day out, I knew the answer: it would kill ME.

I peeked at my alarm clock and saw the red digital numbers say 6:47am. I have time to lay here for a little more time with my sweet heart. I brought my arms in a bit tighter around him in his extra big shirt and closed my eyes, imagining I was Mrs. Bieber, and this was a Sunday and we had all day to lay around together, making love and drinking coffee, reading the Sunday paper in bed. It's such a cliché that usually I'd roll my eyes at. But with him in the picture, it looked so lovely…and impossible.

I sighed and noticed that Justin doesn't snore. He is so silent and still. This is day 4. Thursday. Ten more days to go. That's a good amount of time…and yet it is no time at all. I pictured him taking his bag in his hand, slinging it over his shoulder and putting on his sunglasses. Kissing me goodbye one last time and saying something terrible like, "Thank you Selena, for having me. I had a lot of fun."

And then him walking out with a smile on his face while my world was crumbling to the ground around me. Could I keep a stupid smile on my face during that? NO! I'm not that good an actress.

My mind flashed with the image of me laying on the floor, clutching Justin's leg as he tried to yank himself free and leave while I blubbered and begged him to stay. Ugh. That looks more like me, alright.

I began to think over what was said last night, knowing I'd have to update my notes and listen to the tapes in school again to see if I missed anything so far. How am I kidding? I'm missing everything. I had hit a wall last night when I had asked what happened between him and Tanya after they were married and the money trouble began to tear them apart.

Nothing, he said. Nothing.

Unless she just vanished into thin air, there was more I needed to get. More digging I needed to do. She must have left him, or…God, I hope she didn't die. That would explain the tears and the sadness in him. If he never cried and never dealt with the pain, that would explain his emotional release now that I was making him talk about it more.

Her name was Tanya. That's what he said. WAS. Well, that could mean she's still alive but not in his life anymore…or it could mean death.

Maybe I could ask my father to check her out. No, that is so wrong. I don't want to find anything out that way. I want Justin to tell me on his own.

I hate mysteries, this is driving me insane! I wish I could hypnotize him and ask everything I want in one shot. Then I could help him faster. I never knew I'd have to play detective in this job. But everyone hides something when you start asking them questions. No one likes to show their bad side and pain on the first few visits.

Every body lies. Every body hides. Including me.

And what was that about Victoria? She had said she owned him and saved his life and he knew she was right? I caught that but let it go because he was becoming so upset. I have to listen to my tapes again today, closely.

I can't wait to talk some more to James. I have to be so careful not to tell him too much. I don't fully trust him, either. Something about his eyes. They're not very warm.

I wish I could get my notebook. But I'm pinned under 200 lbs of perfection at the moment. Gladly.

Suddenly, a siren was approaching from way down the street, I think a fire engine. It was high pitched and fast, doing that WOOO-WOOO-WOOO sound. As it got closer, it increased in loudness and I just knew it was going to wake him up. I wish I could reach the window and close it…but it was very hot last night and I was cuddling with my angel so the nice night breezes were heavenly.

And the red truck stopped a few buildings down, and the sirens blared on, the engine humming noisily.

/

EPOV I turned the corner to our street, glad to be close to home now. I was tired and aggravated and needed to close my eyes for awhile.

My eyes immediately saw blue and red flashes – cops. Slowing down a little bit, I peered ahead of me in the darkness. There are cars everywhere. Our place is way up at the other end of the road so there must be some arrest or accident around here.

The whole fucking road is blocked, how the hell am I supposed to get through now? Maybe they'll move and let me pass.

Pulling up, not able to drive any further due to all the police cars and people standing around, I stopped near the police officer who was standing there, talking on a radio.

"Sir, you can't come through here now." The cop said to me, hardly glancing at me as he talked on his radio, ignoring me.

"How do you suggest I get home with all this in my way?" I had an attitude, too exhausted to be polite at this point.

"I don't care how you get home, Sir," the cop talked like a robot, with no tone, "Back up and go around, that's all I can tell you."

He began to turn and walk away from me and I called him, very pissed off now.

"Officer!" I shouted but he kept walking away.

I was going to call again or maybe get out of the car but I really didn't need to get arrested right now, either.

"Fucking asshole." I muttered, putting myself in reverse and turning, holding the passenger side headrest as I drove straight back, withdrawing myself from my own god damned street, "Unbelievable…it's 4 o'clock in the morning…"

I drove all the way around, going past my apartment building, then 10 more blocks past that before I could turn and come around. Now it was nearly 5am and I was extremely angry and annoyed.

On this other end, I could hear sirens wailing. And again, more police cars blocking the road, cops standing around, scratching their asses, earning my tax payer dollars.

"Bullshit!" I sneered, screeching my car to the curb and getting out, slamming the door loudly as I walked towards them, about five of them over here.

"Sir, sir—" one of them said to me, "This street is closed, please go back to your vehicle."

"What?" I squinted and tried to see down the street for my building but it was dark and the police lights were blinding me from seeing shit.

"This is MY street!" I explained a bit loudly, "I live here, how can the street be closed?"

I tried to walk around them but one of the taller cops yelled at me and moved in front of my path, blocking me.

"Sir!" he yelled again, "Go BACK to your VEHICLE I said!"

"I just want to go home and go to BED, JESUS!" I frowned and shouted back, "You can't tell me I can't go to my apartment! What the hell is this? What'd you do, find Bin Laden or something?"

Another cop approached us as we argued and asked me, "What is your problem, sir?"

"My problem is I live on this street and I can't get in there, from either fucking side!" I tried to keep my voice down, "It's late, I want some sleep and I've been driving around like a fucking moron, and no one will let me in!"

"Let me see your license." He said to me, opening his gloved hand.

"Oh, you don't believe me?" I laughed to myself, shaking my head and going for my wallet in my back pocket, "Fine. Here."

I took it out and gave it to him, squinting and trying to see down the street and he looked at it, then stared at me for a second.

"See?" I tried to smile, taking my license out of his hand, "I wasn't lying to you. I'm not a reporter or whatever, I just want to go to sleep."

"Come with me, Sir.", the cop took my arm and I thought for a second he was going to arrest me, but he began walking quickly past the cars that were blocking me and I walked with him, keeping up, guessing I'd get my car tomorrow after they were done doing whatever they were doing here.

In a couple minutes, I could see my building and was about to say to the cop, "That's my building."

But I stopped and I saw it. And I froze. A huge burst of sound, a BOOM!

"Uuggghhh!" I jerked up, my body tensing as I shouted, gritting through my teeth. I felt shaky and my breathing was fast and too hard. My chest was stinging.

"Hey you." A sweet soft voice was right beside me as my eyes focused…or tried to.

"Are you okay?" Selena's voice asked, her hands touching my cheeks as my eyes darted around on their own, "You were having a little nightmare, there, I think."

"Oh…" I calmed myself down, "Sorry, Selena."

"Shhh." She kissed my cheek, wiping my face with her thumbs a little bit, "Was it scary?"

She smiled and wrapped her arms around me tight as we were sitting up in front of each other.

I hugged her to me and kissed her neck, cuddling my nose in and answering, "Yes, terrifying. There was this girl named Selena who never shut up and no matter what I tried, she never stopped talking."

"Bastard!" she squirmed in my arms as I started biting her neck and her little laughing screams were like medicine, melting all my anxiety away in a few seconds

I rolled over her as she play squealed and tried to struggle but I soon pinned her down, holding her little wrists down as I licked her mouth, teasing her with little licks, not letting her get my tongue as she bit at the air, missing me.

"Got you." I informed her, "Again."

"Oh, you think so?" she smirked confidently.

"Yes I do." I came back, just as confidant, licking up the skin under her chin as she moaned and wiggled her hips under mine.

"Why did you do that?" I almost complained. And then, my penis was awake, hard and poking into my little Selena, "Look what you did, you naughty little thing."

She laughed, not sorry in the least.

"Now, just for that, I think you'll be my prisoner today." I smiled, kissing her again, deeper.

"I thought….KISS…I was your prisoner yesterday." She said as I kissed her again.

"No." I corrected, getting another kiss, "You were my victim yesterday. KISS. Today, you'll be my prisoner. KISS. Which is an entirely different thing altogether."

"What does that mean?" she smiled as if she trusted me and I got my face into her loose robe, placing a kiss right inside her right breast, hearing her give a deep moan already.

"I tie you up, maybe here, to the bed…" I began, kissing her again, "Then I make you a nice breakfast…and I feed it to you…KISS…then I brush your little teeth for you…KISS…"

"MMMmm" she kissed me back, "Brush my teeth? And then what?"

"Then I ravage you for a few hours…" I kissed her deeper, and added, "And keep making you come until you're screaming for mercy…and water…but you won't get any…not from me…KISS."

"That would be amazing…" she smiled, "If only I didn't have school today."

"No…" I said into her mouth as I kissed her, "I'm not letting you go. I'll write a note to your teacher, signed, Dr. Frankencock."

She giggled and squirmed as I moved my lips lower, moving her robe aside with my nose and licking the sweet pink nipple staring up at me.

"He won't like it." She said as she stared up at the ceiling, "He might discipline me tomorrow."

"Absolutely not." I bit down on the nipple now as she howled out a tiny scream, then through my teeth I added, "You're my little dolly."

She curled her legs around mine and just when I thought maybe she would stay here with me today, her alarm clock rang out, that annoying buzzing.

Reaching over to it, she hit the snooze button, silencing it for now.

"Mmmm.." I groaned, "What time do you have to go today?"

"In about an hour." She frowned down at my face as I licked around her nipple, at the same time I stared back at her sad little eyes.

"I don't think I like it…the way you leave me all the time." I smirked at her, "Aren't you afraid what trouble I could get into, being all by myself all day?"

"Horrified." She smiled down at me, "You don't have any appointments today?"

"No, Selena." I said with a grin.

"Well, I am going to class early and will get back early enough, around 1 today.", she said.

"Good." I said, sounding very pleased, "Perhaps today we can play out another little game I think you might enjoy."

Her face blushed hot red and her lips smiled at me.

"Perhaps.", she teased.

"This one is a little…wild." I warned her, "But you'll be totally safe with me and if you ever feel like you want it to stop…"

"I know, lo mein." She grinned, looking a little excited but nervous.

"Such a clever girl." I kissed her again, loving the taste of her.

"Come on, I'll make you something to eat." I yanked her out of bed as I went to the kitchen, "Is it okay if I remove my shirt now that it's daytime again, Mistress?"

It is getting a little warm now, this apartment heats up fast when the sun rises.

And also, I just wanted to see her expression when I said it. And it was priceless! Her bottom lip hit the floor with a crash.

I chuckled and waited for her reply.

"Yes, slave boy, strip.", she joked, watching me take off my new favorite shirt. I folded it carefully and put it on the bed so I could wear it later tonight.

She excused herself to go to the bathroom and I began to mix batter for pancakes.

It was too quiet in here so again, I snuck on the nick channel and sure enough, there was Sponge Bob. I heard Selena laughing in there at me as the water inside the room went on and a flush sounded.

Today I had it on my to do list to fix that door and the hole in the bathroom wall I'd made my second morning here. I didn't know what else I'd be doing all day. I hope she gives me something I can do.

As I stirred up the pancake batter, my mind kept going back to last night. She held me all night long. She stroked my hair and kissed me while I laid there in her embrace, fighting the fucking tears of guilt and shame that wouldn't stop. I told her I'd fucked another woman yesterday and she didn't even blink.

Why is she so nice? So calm? Or maybe that means she doesn't feel all that strongly about me and doesn't care who else I'm with as long as I'm here for her when she's home. But then…I felt how much she cares…when she put that shirt on me last night…and said what she said…I felt love. I almost didn't remember it at first, but it quickly came back to me.

And her arms around me felt so god damn amazing that I really felt like a real man for a few hours. I felt clean. I felt…

"I don't know how I'm going to be able to sit on this stool now after yesterday." Selena said, sitting on one of them to sit at the counter, watching me make the pancakes now.

I turned and smiled wickedly at her, "I've only just begun to play with you, Selena. Wait until you see what I've got planned in the next couple of days. I hope your bravery holds out."

"Stop trying to scare me." She joked and smiled as I gave her a glass of orange juice.

I did my best evil laugh, sounding like a cheesy villain from an old movie as she giggled with me and I poured batter onto the flat pan beneath me.

"So, are you gonna tell me?" she asked mysteriously, drinking the juice.

"Tell you what?" I asked, truly not knowing what she was referring to.

"Your nightmare." She replied calmly, "You must know that I'm very good at interpreting dreams."

I tensed for a second then made myself relax right away. I didn't need an interpretation. The dream was clear and I knew what it was.

"Do you know that you talk in your sleep?" I asked her, getting her off the subject.

My eyes looked at her and I raised a brow at her as her cheeks flushed redly at my whim. God, that is sexy.

I flipped a pancake or two over as she was the nervous one now, on the hot seat.

"I've been told…" her voice was very timid and quiet now, "that. What did I SAY?"

"Mmmm…." I played with her now, putting three pancakes on a plate, "Amazing, perverse…hot things…things I'll never tell you."

I placed her plate in front of her as her mouth formed a thin line.

"Come on." She pleaded.

"Nope." I put the plastic bottle of syrup down on the counter and handed her a fork, too.

"Brat." She fumed and pouted. She was so adorable I nearly laughed and told her. But no, that is my little secret. I wanted to keep it to myself for awhile.

She huffed and started to eat as I got my own plate and sat across from her at the counter. At least she forgot about asking about my dreams.

"Justin…can I ask you something?"

"Sure." I said, hoping it was something I could answer.

"Last night, you said Victoria told you, that first time you…worked for her…that she owned you and saved your life. Is that for real, or is that like, an expression?"

"No." I answered, taking a bite of pancake oozing with syrup, "She did own me, at first. And she really did save my life. I had borrowed a lot of money from this loan shark someone told me about. Even when I took it, I knew I couldn't ever pay it back…and they want it back plus interest. I was kinda back on the streets for a few days then and I just kept walking and taking trains, to anywhere, randomly, trying to hide from them. Then, one night my luck ran out and I heard them following me. It was real late at night, I think around 2 in the morning or something, and they grabbed me, took me into an alley and proceeded to beat the shit out of me, asking for their money. I didn't really know how to fight back then, and even if I did, it's not much of a fair fight, one guy holding you while the other punches you in the face and stomach. Anyway, this alley happened to be behind Fire, and Emmett heard the whole thing…and he beat those guys up and brought me into the club, into the back door.

I was pretty hurt, had some broken ribs. Emmett had me in the dressing room and was taking care of me, taping them up. Victoria soon showed up in there and that's when I met her. She was very nice, she said I had a nice chest and then said she was going to call an ambulance but then the loan sharks busted in the back door and demanded me.

I knew I was dead, they had their guns cocked and even when Victoria asked what they wanted, they said they wanted to take me out back and shoot me in the face. They were pissed and hurt after Emmett's attack.

I started to stand up to go with them and Emmett shoved me down into my chair and stood in front of me. And then Victoria stood in front of Emmett. She asked them how much I owed them.

Victoria told them to give her 15 minutes and they'd get their money. She took me up to her office and made me take all my clothes off. She told me to…show her how much I wanted to live and then if I was good enough, maybe she'd pay those guys and save me. I…did it with her…and then she paid my debt.

The loan sharks left, paid, telling me I was lucky and not to ever go to them for money again.

Then Victoria turned to me and told me that she owned me now and I would work for her and do anything she said. And that's when I started to work at Fire."

"Justin…" she said in a low voice, staring at her plate, her fork picking at the pancakes.

"She saved me." I stated simply, hearing the pity in Selena's voice, "She didn't have to, she could've let them kill me. And I thought I was dead, even after I did Victoria. I thought I didn't do well because I was hurt and had broken ribs and it hurt like hell, but I guess she liked me enough to help me out."

I kept eating and saw Selena staring at her glass of juice now, thinking about something I couldn't read in her eyes.

"Why did you borrow money, why did you need all that money?" she asked, looking at me.

"I told you…I was broke." I hoped she'd just leave it at that. But this is Selena and she didn't.

"But you wouldn't go to loan sharks to borrow money just for rent or something, that's insane."

I laughed. "Aren't you supposed to refrain from words like insane when you're talking to your patients? That's not very Dr. Selena of you."

"I'm not Dr. Selena right now." She informed, a tad frustrated now.

I was finished eating and it looked like she wasn't hungry, either.

"Are you done?" I asked.

"No, I'm not done. I just want to know you, Justin." She sounded so lost and small suddenly, "I'm not trying to pry, I just wish you would trust me more. I told you, I am your friend. You can talk to me."

I smirked and looked down into her sweet little eyes, correcting myself.

"No, I meant…" I lifted her plate a little, "Are you done…eating?"

"Oh." She turned bright red again and I couldn't stifle a little snicker, "Yes, thank you."

"Selena…" I began carefully as I put the dishes near the sink, "I know you want to know me…and I am trying very hard to help you and answer your questions. I really am. But there are some things I just can't tell you. Things if I told you, you wouldn't understand. I do trust you and I can't believe that only 3 days in, I'm telling you what I'm telling you. But there are some doors that are locked forever and will never open again. Do you…understand that?"

"Yes." She looked a little defeated as she looked at me, and added, "But I will keep trying and you can't get mad at me for that. It's my job. It's not really about my grade in school anymore, Justin. I really want to help you."

"You are." I walked up to the counter, taking her face in my hands and kissing her, "Do you know how long it's been since someone has held me? KISS. And wanted to talk to me? KISS. I am so sorry that I'm making it hard for you."

I leaned my forehead to hers and closed my eyes, smiling, and saying, "You make me feel real, Selena. I like this."

She let out a breath and she stood up, holding me closer as I placed another small kiss against her sweet, syrup tasting mouth.

"Go get dressed for school, Selena." I said before I decided to take her right here on the countertop.

/

BPOV

I was still deep in thought about Justin as I walked with the girls to school. They asked me how things with Justin were going and I just said, "Fine."

I didn't want to tell them anything and I knew they were a little upset or hurt at my silence, but I didn't care. I was so hurt and sad and confused, frustrated and feeling incompetent, giddy in love and heartbroken at the same time.

He would never leave this lifestyle. He said so. And he didn't fully trust me, either. But what did I expect, it's only been 3 days. I expected too much, I didn't want to work hard for it. I decided to stop being a little brat and be more patient…and to keep trying. Don't give up became my new motto.

That bitch, Victoria! He really talked as if he trusted her, but he can't trust me? I bet she knows his whole life story. What a pimp ! How could she do that to him? I fantasized the whole scene in my head…

Justin sitting there, his shirt off as Emmett wrapped white tape over the broken bones, the bruises coloring his white skin darkly as he held a cloth to his bleeding mouth.

"OWWWW…" Justin groaned, wincing as the tape pulled them together snugly.

And then Victoria's voice came floating up behind Justin's bare back.

"Well, well, well…" she cooed, "What do we have here?"

"Oh," Emmett stood up and Justin half turned towards her, holding a hand over the taped area of his body, "Victoria, this is Justin. He was having a little trouble out back and I brought him inside to patch him up a little bit."

"Emmett, you're so cute…" Victoria smiled at Justin as she spoke to Emmett, running her hand through Justin's bronze locks, then down his back, "Always taking in strays…"

"I'm sorry, I should go." Justin cringed, holding his ribs as he tried to stand and pick up his crumpled shirt.

"No, no, no…" Victoria eased him back down into the chair as Emmett did the same, "Stay…this is my place and you're my guest. How about a nice drink and something to eat? And I'll call an ambulance if you need one."

"Oh no, I couldn't…" he was probably embarrassed that he was hungry but at the same time, proud.

"I insist." Victoria smiled, stroking the back of her fingers along his cheek, "You look hungry, my love. I'm going to get you a nice juicy steak, Justin. Let Emmett help you, he's very good at taking care of bruises and things. Stay."

She walked away and gave Emmett a look.

I imagined a friendly conversation between Justin and Emmett about who those guys were who were beating him and why…and then Victoria brought him a nice hot meal and probably sat there, with him and Emmett, listening to the whole story as Justin ate, not able to resist the scent of steak cooking. It was probably days since he had last eaten.

And then, perhaps, by this time, the loan sharks or their henchmen, whatever they were, probably came to in the alley and were now very pissed and busted in the back door of the club, wanting revenge…wanting Justin.

Like Justin said, I saw them in my mind, guns in hand, staring at a frightened but still Justin.

"Get up, pretty boy.", one of them sneered in my vision, "Time to pay."

Emmett stood up right away, a bulking wall of muscle.

"You want some more?" Emmett threatened more violence on the pair, smiling and ready, standing in front of Justin.

They cocked their guns at Emmett's face and one of them said, "Unless you can catch bullets in your teeth, you'll get out of the way and let us transact our business. Stay out of it. It's none of your concern."

Justin stood up and held his hand against his right side, saying, "Emmett, don't. He's right, I'll go with them."

"Sit down, Justin." Victoria stood up, frowning and saying to the men, "This is MY place, how dare you come in here with GUNS?"

"Victoria, no!", Justin lightly scolded her, not wanting her to get hurt, either.

"That little cock sucker owes us a lot of money!" one of the men shouted, "We were going to let him have one more day, after a little warning, but now we're pissed! That goon of yours put a lump on the back of my head and broke my partner's hand! Be glad we're just shooting pretty boy, there, in his cute little face and not your boy, too."

"Wait here." Victoria said with a wicked tone of voice to them, "I will go upstairs, have a little talk with Justin, here, and then I will bring you your money, in cash."

She slowly moved, standing in front of Emmett now, protecting her dancer.

Justin's face frowned in confusion and hesitation as he looked at her, but she kept her eyes on the men with guns.

"You think we're stupid?" one of them asked, "We're not waiting around while you call the cops."

She scoffed and Emmett laughed.

"Cops." She laughed to herself, "I have drugs and whores in private rooms fucking clients here, you think I call cops…for any reason? I don't need a cop, I can fuck you two up all by my self. This is not my first time, you know."

They looked quickly at each other, thinking.

"I know that you work for someone else." Victoria informed so calmly, smiling, "And that if you don't get his money tonight, you are both in a lot of trouble yourselves. You may get a little pleasure out of killing Justin, but then you'll never get your money. And what will your boss say to you, then?"

They looked nervous and swallowed, realizing she was right.

"Give me a moment to deal with Justin." Victoria backed up and took Justin by the hand, "Once we work out our business, and if that goes well, I'll bring your money down to you myself…in cash. That's the deal. Take it…or leave it."

Finally, one of them said, "Hurry up."

"Certainly. Come, Justin." Victoria gave a charming smile and led Justin away with her, asking Emmett to chat with them until she got back.

The walk down the hallway and over the red line that led into the full, dark club must've been difficult for Justin, with broken ribs. He probably saw, then, the dancers and the women and the cage as she silently led him up the stairs to her private office.

The office door closed and she turned the lock, a deadbolt, walking a few steps away from him, sitting on her desktop and looking at him, crossing her long, creamy legs.

"Justin, Justin, Justin…" she shook her head, "Tsk, tsk, tsk…you are in a terrible predicament, aren't you, my love?"

He stood close to the locked door, smart enough to know what she wanted from him. Not used to being in this type of situation, his nostrils flared and his jaw set, his mouth a hard line, his eyes going to the floor, desperately empty as he tried to think a way out of this mess.

"You can't pay them all that money." He said with a dull tone of voice, "And why would you? You don't even know me."

"Well, that's why I brought you up here." Victoria put her hands on the desk at her sides, smiling and toying with him, her eyes moving over his chest, "We're going to get to know each other…and if I like you, I'll pay those assholes. After which point, you will be mine, completely, until you pay back your debt. You'll do everything I say, and work for me. Or…if not, you can limp your ass back downstairs, go with those guys outside and let them fuck your mouth with their guns before they shoot you. I know those guys. I know who they work for. They won't kill you quickly. It will take a long, long time. And when they kill you, you'll be glad."

"What do you want?" he asked, his arms holding his ribs as he hunched over a little, leaning against the door.

"Take off your clothes, everything." She said, right to the point, unashamed.

His eyes widened and darted up to hers at this and she held her stare back at him, showing him she wasn't kidding.

He didn't move for a bit, his breathing increasing just a tad as he thought over his options, not liking either of them.

"You don't want to die, do you, Justin?" she pushed gently with her words, "You have something to live for, don't you? You don't want to lose it forever, do you, Justin?"

After a minute, Victoria rolled her eyes and said, "Oh, come on, Justin, do you really prefer a painful death over ME?"

Justin stood there another minute, then finally closed his eyes for a second or two, his hands unbuttoning his pants and unzipping them, exhaling and pulling them down, groaning in a bit of pain from his ribs.

Victoria grinned, nodding a couple times as he kicked off his boots, removing the pants, letting them sit in a puddle on the carpet, and then quickly removing his underwear before he let himself think about it too much.

He leaned back to the door now with a disturbed expression, his arms tense and his right hand clung to his left arm, his hands fists, covering his genitals as his body shivered a bit, his eyes on the floor below him.

"Relax, love, relax…" she smiled at his innocence and felt aroused, "It's only skin, I see it every day. Turn around…slow. Let me see you, angel."

With a shudder, he slowly made himself turn around. The motion seemed to take an eternity but finally his ass was facing her and he let his head hit the door with a little thud, resting it there, his eyes closed as his breathing increased and became troubled.

Victoria even thought she heard him whimper.

"Are you crying?" she giggled, "Jesus."

He didn't answer.

"You have a good ass." She gave her professional opinion, "A little more muscle wouldn't hurt. You'll work out everyday from now on. Emmett will show you. Turn back around."

He obeyed her, his eyes wet and cold as he looked at her, his mouth in a cement frown.

"Put your arms down." She ordered, waiting.

He hesitated again and she smiled, saying, "Those guys aren't going to wait forever. And if they shoot Emmett while they're waiting, that'll be all your fault."

Exhaling again, he stiffly put his arms at his sides, pinning them against the door as if something was holding them their against his will.

"Wow." She looked impressed, "I see why you were protecting that. Very good, Justin. Make it hard."

His eyes darted up to hers. "What?" he breathed, in disbelief.

"Make. It. Hard." She spelled it out slowly as if he were slow or something.

"I can't just…make it…hard…" he looked humiliated, "I'm not a machine!"

"Sure you are." She said without emotion, "We're all machines. If you want to live and survive, you better make yourself a machine. Now. If you belong to me, I won't tolerate this hesitation and there will be no coddling. I'm not a kindergarten teacher and you're no child. Stop wasting my time and make it hard."

She gave him a minute or two and he closed his eyes, struggling internally. And soon, he was erect and hating it.

"Come here, Justin." She demanded without pity.

She pulled up her little dress, exposing her small patch of red hair between her legs as he slowly approached, his face full of turmoil and pain.

"Lesson one." Victoria held his chin in her soft, perfumed hand, shaking it a little, "Lose that face. No tears, no disgust, no frown…smile."

He let out a tortured breath at this remark and she frowned at him squeezing his face a little harder, "Smile, Justin. Make me believe you want me."

His lips turned up at the corners a bit, trying to smile but his eyes were full of loss and hurt.

"Come on, try again…" she cooed sweetly, seeing him trying, "Let me see your pretty smile, love."

He smiled more but it never touched his eyes.

"We can work on that later." She looked disappointed, "Fuck me."

"Victoria…" his eyes clenched shut for a moment.

"Now." She laid back on her desk, "I like it hard and rough. No kissing. Although you'll learn to do that for clients later. Come on, Justin, tick tock."

Without a word, he came closer to her, and winced as she put her legs up on his shoulders, resting them there, waiting.

"Make it good, Justin." She warned, "Make me cum and I'll pay your bill."

The bell rang and I jumped sharply, seeing James standing in front of the class, putting down his chalk and dusting off his hands, "That's it. Have a good day, people."

Shit. Class is over and I don't think I heard a word of it. Crap, I hope there's no test on anything he just said.

I took my bag and began to walk out, falling near the back of the crowd and following as I heard James ask, "You alright, Selena?"

I snapped alert and turned to him, stopping.

"Yea, fine." I lied.

The rest of the kids were out now and James smirked, knowing better, "I know that look on your face. That was the – I'm a million miles away - look. I'm a psych professor, I know these things."

"I'm sorry…I just…wandered, I guess…" I tried to explain it, failing miserably.

"Come here, sit down." He offered me a desk in the front row, and sat at the one beside me, "Talk to me, Selena. What's on your mind?"

I was stupid…I was hurting…and feeling like I was failing Justin…and without thinking about it, I started to cry.

I felt like a damn fool and worse, a little girl and I was humiliated that James was seeing me like this. He must think I'm such a screw up.

"Uh oh." James said calmly, going to his desk and coming back with a real cloth hankerchief, giving it to me.

I took it and held it over my mouth, more to block the little sobs threatening to come out. Something inside me was in great pain and I had been holding it in, and now I couldn't stop it.

"Shhhh.." James sat down next to me again, waiting for me to speak.

"I'm never gonna be a psychiatist." I wept through the cloth.

"Yes you will, Selena." James said, unflinchingly, "And you'll be a great one."

"I'm so afraid to ask what I'm supposed to ask." I cried, the tears really falling now, "And afraid of what his answers will be. And I'm so scared he'll get mad and leave if I ask things too hard to answer. And I want to help him but he keeps pushing me away. And I hate hurting him with my questions. He cried last night and I wanted to die. Just when I think I'm starting to know him, he doesn't answer me and he wants to talk about sex again."

"Alright, you're talking about Justin." James said, confirming to himself aloud, "I know he's a tough first patient and I warned you it would be difficult. Sex is his crutch, his shield to hide behind. You know that already. But you can do this. You're not afraid – like – thinking he'll turn violent, are you?"

"No." I sniffed, "He's not violent."

Images of him holding his hand over my mouth flashed to mind and my body felt warm for two seconds.

"Okay." James stared at me, a pleasant look on his face, as far as I could tell through my tears, "What is it you're afraid of, Selena?"

"If I tell you…promise me you'll never say anything…" I heard my voice whimper.

"I promise, Selena." James squinted a bit, "Doctor's oath, remember?"

"I care about him." I was sobbing a little again, "I think…"

"Think what, Selena?" James put a hand on my back.

I sugarcoated it and said, "I think I'm having…feelings for him."

The truth was – I was deeply in love with him and knew I could never get out of it now. I wanted to be with him forever, but I knew that was impossible for us. A million and three things stood in our way and I know he can never love me in return, after all he's been through. It would take a miracle for him to even say the words I love you and mean them.

And even it he did, we still had one million and two more obstacles to overcome. I felt like I was looking at a field of mountains as the winds blew and the thunder crashed…and I already felt tired.

We could never make it. We would never make it.

"Selena." James rubbed my back as he spoke calmly, not acting surprised, "This is very common. Especially when you're still learning like you are. It's okay to care about him, that's what a good therapist does. But you can't have feelings for him, Selena, you can't. You have to stop yourself. I know you said he's very attractive and it's his job to be charming and flirty and lure you in. He's a master manipulator from what I've heard of him so far and he will keep doing it, even if he doesn't realize he's doing it. You can't let him seduce you that way, Selena. You have to be stronger than him."

I can't let him seduce me…that is for to laugh, I heard my inner teenager quip as I recalled the seven orgasms, him ramming himself into me from behind, the stool, the counter, the shower, the massage! He had already seduced me numerous times and not only my body – my mind, my heart, my soul even!

I quieted a little and croaked, "What if I'm not?"

"Then you have to let him find a real doctor…and you have to let him go." James said certainly, "For his sake as well as yours. You can't help a drowning person if you're drowning, too, can you?"

James loved the drowning person image. I guess he had stuck that into my mind also, that's how I saw Justin last night.

"No." I sniffed, wiping my eyes with the hankerchief.

"You'll be alright, Selena." James smiled and looked at me closer, "Would you like me to drive you home?"

"No." I began to stand, "I can walk, it's so nice outside."

"Alright." He stood with me, patting my shoulder, "Have a nice evening. Keep your chin up."

"Thanks." I went to hand him back his hankerchief and he held a hand up, saying, "Keep it, sweetie."

Yea, I guess he doesn't want it back now, after I slobbered all over it.

I folded it and tried to smile at him as I left class, him right behind me, saying goodbye again as he went towards the parking lot and I walked off campus, towards home.

/

BPOV By the time I reached home, I did feel a lot better – but more like an idiot for breaking down in front of James that way. I guess I needed to let it out, though, and really did feel as if I had been cleansed, in a way.

My problems were not gone by any means, but I told myself that I could handle this. I would have to try harder with Justin and keep my feelings for him light and not get too heavy with him.

I feared me holding him all night would scare him away more but this morning he did voice that he had enjoyed being held and I truly believed him. He said I made him feel real. I got misty eyed even now, recalling his voice saying those words.

From now on, I would have to be happy with our time together, enjoy it, try my best to help him, stop being afraid to hurt his feelings, and stop being scared to make him angry. I would have to start doing my job…no matter what.

I missed him again, even though in my thoughts, I never really left him. His kiss this morning when I left was the most powerful one yet and I did find myself trusting him, despite my brain's warnings. This I felt in the heart. And my heart wasn't listening to my mind at this point.

This was certainly going to end in disaster and I knew that, too.

When I reached the top of the stairs, part of me was paranoid and looking around, wondering if Justin would jump out from behind me again to do a repeat of yesterday's performance. But, sadly, no rapist on my stairs today.

Instead, there was a note inside on the kitchen counter. A little gold sticky note that read only – Put a tank top and skirt on and come to me.

There was an address, this was a few blocks away, in town.

I felt my lips smile and I went to my room to follow my instructions right away, wondering what was going on but the mystery and anticipation was making me crazy.

I even put a little more makeup on, looking at myself in the full length mirror in my bathroom. I didn't look bad at all, I thought, unusually, as I looked over my little white tank top that held my breasts up and together quite nicely, giving me a pretty little cleavage, and my light, airy gauze red mini skirt, along with a cute pair of shoes Alice got me last month, red high heels, and a strap that went around my ankle, very sexy. I bet Justin will love these.

I almost didn't wear underwear but decided against it, not sure what the plan was exactly. Besides, if a nice stiff wind blew up, my skirt was so sheer it would fly up with it and I'd give everyone on the street a nice little peep show.

I fixed my hair and even used a little perfume, then I hurried out, only taking a little red purse with me to hold my house key in. I went back and put a couple of condoms in there, too, Just in case. With Justin, I was never sure what he was up to.

I had the little sticky note in hand and got to the street he had written. Now I just had to locate the right building.

243, 243…I needed. All these buildings were stores, shops, restaurants…maybe he's meeting me for lunch.

Okay, this is 216 where I am now. I needed to cross the street and keep walking a little bit more.

I passed people and a couple of men smiled at me as I went by and I felt myself blush. Men are too easy. Just wear a little makeup and some high heels and their tongues are hanging out.

I reached 243 and saw it was a book store. The Guardian the sign said. I looked at my note and in the window. It was huge inside, very empty people wise, an older man sitting at the register in front, reading a book, his glasses perched down his nose, appearing bored.

Why would Justin want me to come here and wear a skirt and tank top? Maybe this is wrong.

I went to the door and opened it, a little bell ringing merrily as I stepped in. The old man straightened up, pushing up his glasses as the dim light from the sun made a little white spot against his almost bald head.

Smiling at me, he was the soul of friendliness and customer service.

"Good afternoon, Miss." He stood alertly at his post.

"Good afternoon." I grinned back, looking around. It was very silent and pleasantly a bit dark in here, not lots of bright lights, only the sun from the window giving some light inside. Rows and rows of books went far back into the store and it looked darker the further back they went.

"May I help you find anything special, my dear?" he asked, trying to be helpful.

Yea, where's my hot demon Justin?

"Umm, no thanks, I'll just browse around, if that's alright." I replied timidly.

"Certainly." He gave a nod, "Take your time. Call me if you need anything."

"Thanks." I glanced back at him, slowly walking down the tall bookcases that were as tall as the ceiling. I peeked into each row, looking for Justin, finding no one. I think I'm the only one in this store. There were red signs here and there that said things like, "Please return books to shelves correctly. Thank you."

As I walked further in, I gasped. There were stone pillars and marble columns and back here, the ceiling raised up in a cathedral style, looking now like a church, a castle with lots of dark rows of bookcases that reached about thirty feet over my head.

This is amazing ! So beautiful! It wasn't a nice, bright, cheery looking castle, either. It looked medieval, dark, and a feeling of foreboding crept inside me.

This must be a converted church or something I told myself, seeing large tables over against the wall, with chairs to sit and read at, and it was very dim over there. There was one lamp on each table but they were shut off, I guess to save electricity if no one was in here reading.

I looked for about ten minutes and didn't see another soul in this place. The old man was worlds away now, at the front of the store and I was wondering if maybe he or I had made a mistake somewhere in the plan.

I turned to start walking back but then I noticed a long aisle going to the left I hadn't checked yet and a sign over the aisle read "Sexual Help".

My mouth smiled and I muttered to myself, "You prick…"

I know he's in there, I just know it.

Slowly, I went towards the aisle and peeked in. No one there. I looked around. No one anywhere. I walked inside the aisle and was both comforted and nervous about the dimness surrounding me. One small light shone up from the ceiling but I began to browse at the books I was walking past.

I let my fingers touch one or two of them, and then I saw one that looked pretty naughty and right up my aisle. "Learning to be a Submissive."

Peeking around me, I saw nothing and took a breath, opening the book and flipping into it. Wow! The pictures ! I was mesmerized by the black leather collars and rubber outfits…the incredible positions they were tied in baffled me and I felt my mouth sitting open as I began to move the book around sideways, trying to figure out if she was upside down or not….

"I've read that one.",a deep male voice said behind me and I screamed out loud, throwing the book up into the air and feeling it hit me in the nose as it fell to the floor. That whole thing had happened in one second.

A small chuckle came from the voice behind me and I didn't look yet. I squatted down to pick the book up and I began to shove it back into it's tight place in the bookcase but the hand behind me reached out and took it from me.

I knew it was Justin but I was trying to recover from my heart attack with some shred of maturity. Also, I wanted my face to cool so he wouldn't see me blushing. I hated blushing.

"A submissive's role is to serve and to give pleasure." His husky voice read out of the book behind me, "But it must be a gift, given to her Master freely and with complete love and affection."

I almost went to turn towards him but stopped myself. His hand slowly moved up the side of my leg and traveled up inside my skirt, stroking delicately up and down.

"A submissive is a volunteer." He read, his voice like molten lava sex, "A slave is not a volunteer."

His free hand was high up my outer thigh, massaging a little more deeply now, moving along behind me, under my panties, caressing my right ass cheek as he kept reading.

"Your Master may lash your body with his whip," he read, his fingers clutching the side strap of my panties, "But it is also his pleasure to kiss and caress the pain away."

He began to pull my panties down a bit and I looked straight ahead, seeing through the bookcase, over the tops of the books before me, and looked around in horror for other people. This is a public place…oh no…is he going to….right here in the middle of a store? Holy fuck!

I can see myself now, calling my father to bail me out because I was caught fornicating in a book store.

"Does any of that…interest you?" he asked, not reading from the book anymore.

He was kind of asking if I wanted to go further and I kept looking through the cracks, into the next aisle. His hand waited, not moving my panties down yet.

I was shaking all over and answered, "Yes."

"Mmmmm…" his voice purred as he put the book back into its place and then both of his hands were under my skirt, stroking up and down my legs. His body was right up against me, behind me, pressing his hard penis into my ass. I felt his mouth kiss the cotton over my back and I smiled to myself, glad I skipped wearing the bra this once. I remember angry rapist yelling about it yesterday.

His fingers roamed under the easy little skirt and rubbed more firmly over the front of my panties, moving up and down right in the creases between my thighs and crotch. I put my head back against his shoulder and sighed, trembling all over as his lips and tongue traveled all over the inside of my neck.

Shoving my long hair aside with his face he began to take bites and rougher kisses. I could feel his hands slide down into my panties and fingers touched my clit and traveled down the little hair inside.

I gasped out, then quieted myself as he whispered darkly into my ear.

"I'm going to fuck you Selena…right here…right now…" his voice made me even wetter as I shivered more, "Do you want me?"

"Yes." I whispered, feeling a little dizzy from the fear and excitement at the same time.

"You little slut…"he seethed in my ear, "So horny, you will let me fuck you right in the middle of a bookstore…you should be ashamed of yourself."

"Yes, Justin." I said as subserviently as Justin always says yes, Selena, to me all the time. I heard him chuckle again.

His hands slowly moved my panties down and he squatted down with them then said, "Lift your feet out…hold on."

I lifted one high heeled foot out of the panties and then the other, holding onto the shelf in front of me.

"Shit, look at those shoes!" Justin commented as he noticed them more now.

I peeked again through the bookcase and then to the side, panting in fear of the old man or another customer walking by and seeing us.

He put my panties in between two books, some sticking out a bit as his hands slowly moved over the tank top, up and down…up and down…creating hot friction there and his mouth kissing my bare shoulders, licking…sinking teeth in just enough to make me moan out, trying to keep it quiet.

"I love what you're wearing, Selena." His voice kept dripping sexily into my ear, "You are so fucking sexy and you don't even know it. I love that about you."

His fingers moved the straps of my tank top sideways, off my shoulders, moving them down and using his fingers that traveled over my breasts to push the top down to my waist, off my naked chest.

The top was down around my arms and waist, almost trapping my arms at my sides. His mouth found my lips and he was kissing my mouth hard as my nude breasts became victims of his rough, squeezing hands.

"Uuuuhhhhh…." I sounded, going from closing my eyes in lust and opening them suddenly to check if anyone was coming.

His lips kept probing mine and his tongue fought mine for dominance as his hands traveled down to my skirt again, yanking it up and letting it rest above my bare ass.

"Step your feet up to the first shelf.", he said, his breathing as deep as mine was.

I did what he said, hoping I wouldn't fall, clumsy as I was and the high heels were not my usual shoe, either.

But I had a little room on the first shelf below me to properly place my shoes down, side by side. My hands held the shelf in front of them and I felt like I was pretty secure here.

"Apart." He demanded with a stern voice, parting my legs until they were very far apart. They shook a bit and he moved some books in front of me aside, clearing the shelf and ordered, "Bend over."

I was able to lay my breasts on the shelf and bend a bit now, sticking my ass and vagina, spread eagle, out to him.

I kept imagining someone coming and seeing us, even a person coming to the aisle before this one would see my tits and head staring back at them.

"Yes…" Justin stroked his fingers along my pussy and began to insert them one finger at a time inside me, pumping them in and out as I tried to moan and gasp as quietly as I could.

"You are so filthy…" he whispered, his cock still in his jeans but rubbing and poking my ass as he fucked me with his long cool fingers as they curled deep inside of me, "Look at you, moaning and being fucked by my hand in public in the Sexual Help section."

His words pushed me closer and closer to the edge and I was so god damned turned on by them, along with the attentions of his hand. I wanted to scream out but clamped my lips down hard, trying to block out my surroundings and just concentrate on him.

I had always been the "good girl, the nice girl, the plain girl." It felt so stimulating, forbidden and sensual being the filthy little slut that is so horny she'd let herself be taken and fucked in the middle of a store like this.

Justin is a GOD! It's like he can see into my brain and knows what I need.

I was leaning over the shelf now, my breasts propped against their edge as my long hair and face hung slightly into the next aisle, panting and growling, biting my lips down and wincing in pure heat. I could hear his fingers squishing in and out of me, the wetness and the fear intense and red hot.

For a long time, he fingered me and licked his fingers, then inserted them again. I came three times from that alone and hardly made that much noise, even though, inside my head I was screaming and howling.

I felt like a human book at that point, sitting on a tight shelf, books snugly on both sides of my arms as my ass hung out the other end, legs still wide apart and wobbling to stay on the little edge of the shelves, feet trembling and clawing to stay on the wood below them as I heard Justin behind me, unzipping his jeans.

All Justin could see of me now was my ass and legs from his place behind me and I found that extremely erotic, like I was an object in the shelves, only here for the customers that would come in, needing sexual help, and using me without a word, as if reading me, as I was stuck in here, helpless and trapped.

"I had no idea when I came in this aisle, how helpful this section would be." He said, sounding like he was smiling before I heard a plastic crinkling, his condom, I guessed – and then he was slowly inserting his head into my sopping wet pussy.

He kept teasing me, inserting a bit, then withdrawing…inserting again a little more…I wanted to scream at him but all I could get out were growls and deep panting breaths.

"Alright, sexy Selena," he finally chuckled, "I'll stop fooling around and get to it."

At this, he inserted himself all the way inside me and I gave a semi-scream, trying to take it quietly as he grabbed at my waist, slapping my ass cheeks against his hips as he slammed me over and over, faster and harder.

"Did you know this was a church before they turned it into a bookstore?" he asked as he kept fucking me, messing with my mind as well as with my body, "Which means you're being fucked on holy ground, in the most sacred of places, church! I guess that means you're going to hell with me now."

I screamed out, unable to restrain myself at that last line.

I want to go to hell, if that's where you are. Screw heaven. Clouds and wings are highly overrated. I'll take sex in the cages of flame with Justin instead…any day.

"I hope no one hears you and comes to find you." He teased and made me worry as he kept pounding me, the slapping sounds a bit louder than my noises of lust.

"That would be so humiliating for you, Selena…" he said, his voice a bit strained as he kept pumping, holding my legs for leverage to thrust deeper inside.

He let out a very deep and low growl, coming as I bit my teeth into the edge of the shelf I laid on, trying to hold my own screams in.

Justin was panting very hard as he withdrew, making a SSSSSSSS sound, as if he were feeling a very sensitive burn.

I heard him zip up and take a step back as my eyes got dizzier. I couldn't even form words right now.

"See you at home, Selena." , he said and then he walked out of the aisle, leaving me there as I watched his back go by through the next aisle, my hair half over my eyes as he strolled away.

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