Buses to me are like rubbish TV,

Time-wasting, drab and dirty,

I'd rather take the car,

Than travel so far,

On a smelly, red, vessel of acidity. 

Last week after boarding the bus,

An Inspector accused me of cheating,

He said, "You're a fare dodger",

" A pirate, a jolly Roger",

Indignant, I argued whilst beating,

My fist repeating and repeating,

"I'm not".  "I swiped my Oyster card"

"Check with the driver, or Scotland Yard".

"Do I look like the sort of person to avoid paying my fare?"

"Do I look like the sort of person who cares?"

Was that a rhetorical question? Asshole!