LGBTQ+ People and How to Write Them| PART 1: Gay & Lesbian|

PART ONE: Gay & Lesbian

I've noticed LGBTQ+ people are very under represented in stories and other media. I would like to change that, and to do so I must start by educating writers so they can efectively include LGBTQ+ people in their works. So get comfy, boil yourself a cup of tea, and get ready to take notes (if you want), because I'm gonna teach you a few things.

Hi guys, how's it hangin'? Now, I'm going to assume you're all asking a few questions, one of them being "Why does it matter if LGBTQ+ people are shown in media? What difference is it going to make?"

Well, there is an answer to that! When you're part of a minority (especially if not all or none of your family are the same) you look to be represented in what you read and/or watch for validation. When you don't see people like you in any of your social circles (and sometimes even if you do) or in what you read and/or watch, you can feel almost like you're not real or valid. Feelings like this can crush a person.

You're probably also asking, "What does LGBTQ+ even mean?"

LGBTQ+ is an acronym, standing for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer, with the + representing the many genders, sexualities and romantic expresions not included in the acronym. Don't worry, if you don't know what something is you can totally ask and I'll answer to the best of my ability and there will be other parts to this blog to give more detailed explanations on some of the other terms I feel comfortable in my ability to talk about.

The last question I know someone is thinking of is "How is a straight, cisgender (Identifying with the gender that matches your body parts) person going to acuratley potray LGBTQ+ people?"

Funny you should ask! The only thing straight about me is my hair, and even that's a bit wavy. I'm actually bisexual (meaning I am romantically and sexually attracted to 2 or more sexes or gender expressions, but more on that in another blog), and I know several people who are part of the LGBTQ+ spectrum. I am also part of my school's equity club, have gone to an LGBTQ+ support confrece, and have done plenty of research.

Now onto the rest of the blog! First off, some of you may be wondering what gay and lesbian mean. Well, basically it means a person who is sexually and/or romantically atracted to the same gender or sex (For those of you who don't know, I am using the terms sex and gender differently because they mean different things. Sex is the body parts you have and gender is if you identify as male or female. For most people they are the same, but sometimes they're not.) So in simpler terms gay and lesbian are when a man wants to date and/or sleep with other men, and a woman wants to date and/or sleep with other women.

Okay, so now that you know what they are, let's talk about how to write them into your stories and scripts. For the most part they are the same as every other living being on this planet. However they also have added pressure to their everyday lives that many other people don't have. For example, many will have trouble figuring out who they are and what they are feeling, but they won't go to anyone to talk about it because they fear being regected simply based on their sexuality. 

This is because in the world we live in, it's generally seen as not okay to be anything other than white, straight, male, cisgender and non-religious. People use being of colour, being LGBTQ+, female, or religious as insults every day. I can garentee you've heard at least one of these, maybe with out even realizing it. Let me point out a few common ones I've heard. "That's so gay", "Don't be a pussy", "Why are you such a n*gger?". "He(or she)'s such a Jew", "You act like such a girl". Those are just a few. Imagine just going to school, minding your own bussiness when suddenly you hear yourself being used as an insult. That can be really damaging to a person and have lasting effects on their mental health.

When people come out of the closet (tell everyone their not straight, or cisgender, or whatever the case may be), it's typically a big deal. Many people get forced out of homes and jobs, or bullied endlessly, or lose family and friends because they're hated for something they can't change. No, being gay or lesbian is not something you can change. It takes some people a long time to figure out, some people even date a few people before they can realize that's not what they want. It's a hard thing to go through.

Then there's the issue of being killed off whenever we are reperesented. Have you ever noticed that when there is an LGBTQ+ person in in a book, show, or movie, they are killed off almost instantly? And for seeminlgy no reason? When there were obvious ways they could, and would have kept the character alive if they were straight? Look for it, it's a trend that's hard to miss. Queer baiting is also something to stay away from. Have you ever seen something and just known that two characters were gay or lesbian, and the whole time thought they were going to get together only to have one or both of them end up with a straight love interest? That's called queer baiting, and it's happened in many books and shows including (but not limited to), The Cursed Child (a play written by JK Rowling), Merlin (TV show), Sherlock (TV show), and Supernatural (TV show).

Now that you know the daily struggles as well as a few don'ts, I'm going to tell you some slang often used by people in the LGBTQ+ comunity (but I've heard other people use it too), followed by some dos to help you with those stories.

"Throwing shade" - A term for giving someone a backhand complement. Like when you say something mean, but say it in a way it sounds like a compement. Such as "That dress suits you! Not as much as it suits Shelly, but it looks good on you." or "Dave looks good with green hair, but Steve pulls it off better."

"Spilling the tea" - Meaning "Letting the cat out of the bag" or to tell someone something they didn't previously know. For example "I'm gonna spill some tea here. Dave cheated on you last night." or "Don't spill the tea!" (this example can also be used for litteral tea)

"Butch" - A masculine woman, ussually in referance to a lesbian.

"Bear" - Refering to a large and/or hairy man, usualy being gay.

"Femme" - Can mean either female, or a really feminie lesbian.

"Gaysian" - Meaning an Asian who is gay.

"Gym Bunny" - A gay man who goes to the gym obsesivly.

"Queen" or "Queeny" - A feminie, or "stereo-typical" gay man. Such as "He's Queeny"/"He's a Queen"

"Twink" - A younger looking gay man, typicaly slender or with a small build.

Now, here's your list of dos and don'ts. Do:

  • Have your gays and lesbians written like normal people (so don't over sexualize them basically)
  • Remember how derogatory terms and slang can effect people, and adjust your characters and stories as such.
  • Remember that many people are afraid to come out of the closet, or simply don't come out to their families for fear of being blocked off from reletives or even kicked out at a young age.
  • Some hide their sexualities from their friends for fear of being regected.
  • Do some research, watch some LGBTQ+ movies on netflix (such as GBF and The Immitation Game), look for FAQs and definition lists on google.
  • Try to make your characters realistic and try to avoid stereo-types, unless you're going for a queeny guy or butch chick.


  • Queer bait, it's a massive let down to LGBTQ+ people, and you are bound to anger, or loose them as fans and supporters.
  • Kill of LGBTQ+ people for no reason, or where you wouldn't kill a non-LGBTQ+ character.
  • Work only in stereotypes, add some real in there too.
  • Make their lives out to be more perfect than the average persons, they are ussualy the same or worse.
  • Avoid using LGBTQ+ slang. Look up some terms and definitions if you need to, but people use slang, they can't help it. Even if it's only a liitle, try to include it unless your character is trying to hide their LGBTQ+, even then, include the ocaional slip up for realistic writing.

Well, that concludes this blog. Let me know what you guys thought and be sure to give me feedback so my next blog can be even better. See you all next time. Good bye for now!


Loading ...